On A Roll

I've sent two letters to the Opinion page of our newspaper over the past two days...They are both pretty clever, and I hope they get published. One is about a woman who was shot by a minor while she was out hiking, and the other is in response to an article about how the rich are suffering in today's economy. Here they are:

"The idea of a woman getting shot to death while out for a day-hike is horrifying. I was stunned when I saw this on the news Saturday night, and again when I read the blurb in Sunday's Times. Aside from the fact that I am adamantly against hunting, I can't fathom how this can happen. Why is a minor, who is too young to own a gun, allowed to hunt? How could this child, who is now responsible for taking another human life, mistake a hiker for a bear? Where was the supervising adult? Was the adult next to the child, saying, "Ready, aim, fire?" How can these two hunters now live with themselves? How will the family of the woman now live without her in their lives?"


And...


"You mean even the wealthy are feeling the economic pinch, too? That's so sad, but I'm pleased that we now have something in common. Although, while I'm crying in my coffee, they'll be crying in their beluga caviar..."