Teacher Speak: Is Well-Liked by His Peers

This sounds like a nice comment: "Your son is well-liked by his peers." But do you know what the teacher really wanted to say? "Your son does not ever shut up in class and is continually disruptive by talking with other kids! It is driving me crazy! How do I get him to shut up? I am about to put duct tape on his mouth."

Here are some comments I put on report cards, and then what I really wanted to say instead:

"She works hard and wants to do well."

Your kid is not very bright, I'm afraid. I hope your expectations aren't very high. Plan on supporting her for a very long time.

"I am hoping that he will develop a better sense of cooperation and take responsibility for his actions as the year progresses."

Your kid doesn't get along with anyone. He is disrespectful and sour. The kids don't like to work with him, and neither do I. I've never seen such a dislikable boy. He also blames everything on someone else. Good luck.

"...is settling into the new school and classroom routines, but still needs reminders of the expectations."

He still doesn't follow directions, even after 3 months of school. What's it going to take? He is driving me crazy.

"...must improve the quality of his work if he is to gain the fundamentals needed for 5th grade work."

Your son is smart, but he works like a first grader. His work stinks.

"She is capable of so much more than her progress report reflects, however. She only turns in about half of the homework assignments in any given week. If she does bring back a signed missing homework slip, the assignment rarely comes back in with it. She needs to figure out how to be more responsible in this area before she falls behind in her grades."

Why is your daughter unable to turn in a single assignment? Do you even know what is going on? Are you aware that eventually this will get her failing grades? As a parent, I should be giving you failing grades...Can't you give your daughter the support she needs now to succeed later? That would be nice...

"He has not shown that he is responsible with homework, however, and this greatly affects the grades he receives in all areas, including the academic areas that are his strength (reading and writing). I'd like to see him develop some strong homework habits before moving on to middle school."

Again, I want to give you failing grades in the parenting department. I feel like you are failing your child. Do you notice what a creative boy you have? He needs the structure, though, to succeed academically. Don't you care? And have you noticed that he is showing some effeminate qualities? Are you ready to support him in this area as well?

"He needs to always make sure he is working to the best of his potential, and to make sure that his work quality reflects what he can do as a competent sixth grader."

Your smart son produces work that is on the level of a second grader, I believe. His work quality stinks. He'd better get into gear, or he's going to drown in middle school next year. He's smart, but you wouldn't know it by the work he produces. Try giving him more expectations at home, perhaps, and make him redo things himself so he learns. Don't do his work for him. You do him a desservice.

"...needs to focus on learning to work democratically and respectfully with other students as well as with her interactions with staff members."

I've never seen such a girl with an attitude! I don't know how you are going to deal with her teenage years. Good luck.

"With middle school next year, this should be a situation that...concentrates on and figures out how to solve. This is a perfect year to get into some good homework habits."

Why is your daughter unable to complete any assignments? Why aren't you there at home to make sure she does? She will absolutely drown next year.


"...really wants to do well, and is concerned about his progress. I appreciate his concern."

Your son drives me crazy. I don't understand why he is so concerned about his progress yet is failing? He's not very bright. I think he's got a problem. Can you tell me why he is such a nervous kid? It is not normal. I think he needs a therapist.

"She is a very capable student with many interests. She has great potential and is working towards meeting it. I'd like the quality of her work to reflect her capabilities."

Your smart daughter produces work that looks like a second grader did it. And her idea of what work quality is laughable! I read her 5 paragraph essay, after she claimed to have revised it, and it was awful! These little paragraphs that were devoid of any real detail and description at all. She is capable of writing a 4 paper, but continues to produce only 2 papers. You know, your daughter is not the best student in the sixth grade like you seem to think. I think it's time for you to get real, Mom.