The Winning Entry

The local newspaper is having a contest. They want you to write your favorite Christmas memory, and the Grand Prize winner wins 4 tickets to see the Radio City Christmas Spectacular featuring the Rockettes, and they get a meet and greet session with the Rockettes. Then, five winning essays will each win four free tickets. I'm sure I'll win. This is my essay I wrote:

"I have many wonderful memories of Christmases past, from walking in the snowy woods in search of the perfect Christmas tree to baking cookies for Santa. But one memory stands out the most for me…

Our Christmas tradition when I was little was to spend Christmas Day at my aunt and uncle’s house in Seattle. My grandmother, who lived right next door, would also make the drive from Everett to Seattle with us. We’d all pile into the small, two-door car on Christmas Day. My sisters and my grandmother would sit in the back. My parents would sit in the front. And me? I’d sit on my mom’s lap. Apparently, we didn’t worry about seatbelts in the late 1960s…

On this particular Christmas, we piled into the car for our annual trek into Seattle. I had just gotten into the car and sat down on mom’s lap. That is when it happened.

Even though I was on mom’s lap, I still had to swing my legs into the car. I was in the process of doing this, when mom called out, “Ok, is everyone in?” Before I could answer, she slammed the car door shut. And it slammed shut right onto my big toe!

I am sure that I immediately cried out, and that she quickly opened the door, but the damage had been done. I am sure that my dad drove like a maniac to my aunt and uncle’s house in Seattle. My dad then took me to the Emergency Room at a nearby hospital. This was an embarrassing event for me as well, since I had to take off my tights in front of my dad, the doctor, and a cousin I didn’t really know who came along with us to show us the way to the hospital. This was humiliating for such a shy seven-year old, and was like rubbing salt into the wound.

However, the toe wasn’t broken. We went back to my aunt and uncle’s house. I remember just sitting that year and wearing slippers. That night, my toe hurt me too much to sleep. I got up and went out into the family room where my dad was watching an old movie on tv. I crawled into his lap and snuggled in. I felt better.

But this is not a happy memory. So why should it win? Because I know that my mom felt just terrible for having caused her baby such pain, and on Christmas of all days. A day that should be full of happy surprises for her children instead was a day of pain. And I know she has carried that guilt now for 40 years. If this story wins the contest, I will be sure to take her to see the Radio City Christmas Spectacular, because I believe this is the only way that she can finally let go of that guilt and be at peace.

And Christmas should be all about peace, don’t you think?"

The hardest part for me was keeping the essay to 500 words or less. My original one was almost 600 words. The one I entered is 496. I hope I win!

A Success Story

Last Wednesday morning I was at school checking email, the first thing I usually do when I get into my classroom. As I was reading an email, I received another one. I clicked it open, and read the email. It was from the mom of one of my boys, and she was really angry with me. In fact, I don't think I've ever had a parent so mad at me, and it has happened from time to time over these last 20-plus years of teaching. It doesn't happen as much lately, though, as it used to when I was young and inexperienced.

Anyway, she was livid. Livid is a good word choice here. Here is the edited email:

"Hi I am Bobby’s mother.

I would really love to speak with you about Bobby and how you handle situations with a child that has a disability which is ADHD. I have several concerns, I am extremely upset with the fact that he comes home daily upset about what happens in the classroom as far as him being sent out and then getting a 1 in science because he was not in the class to participate I feel is ridiculous and to me as an educator I would really love to know what “education” you have when dealing with “non-cookie cutter children”. I will not have his self esteem damaged by a teacher who is not capable or patient enough to deal with these types of children. He does have an IEP which is being put in place currently so if need be I can handle this in a variety of ways which will include by passing you and (the school) and going straight to the school district, I have a great lawyers name as well. I have gone through this with my oldest son and (this school) so I am done playing games with people here!!!! I really hope you can provide me some answers as to how we are going to make sure Bobby has a good school year with out crying daily when he gets home because of his classroom situation."

Well, I sat there stunned. Where to begin, where to begin? I knew I should reply as soon as possible, but if this turned ugly, I also wanted my beloved principal to know of the situation. So I forwarded the email to her, along with the background of the situation that had occured the day before with Bobby during science: Students were in small groups of three working on a hands-on science activity where they were to build a "pendulum." At one point, for some reason, Bobby was back at the sink with a boy from another group, and they were happily punching each other many times in the arm. I separated them-one at a study carol in the class, and the other, Bobby, into the hall at a table. There aren't many places to send a kid to cool off. By the time both returned to the class, science was over. Too bad, they missed the fun activity. Punishment enough, I thought, and case closed.

But not closed, apparently...I waited for my principal's response, as I wanted to get a reply off to this mom as soon as possible. Then it was recess, so I wandered over to my principal's office, and peeked in. "Did you see the email from Bobby's mom?" I inquired.

"You mean the one where she's going to sue you?" my principal asked.

"That would be the one," I replied. My principal said that yes, she saw it, and would respond to it-I didn't have to. But, I told her I felt I should be the one to respond, as I was the one who had the information that the mom obviously didn't have about that science lesson. I also told my principal that I was certain I could get the mom's anger deflated enough to be productive. I would, I said, respond not only as a teacher, but as a parent. That always works, I've found.

So I did respond. I sent the email (cc'd to my principal). I thanked her for her email, and said I wanted to give her some details about the situation that she probably didn't hear from her son. I told her then about the arm punching. I explained the whole scenario. I explained further that his belief about getting a bad grade was the result of a speech I gave to the whole class about group participation being just as big of a part of their grade as any test. Bobby apparently realized his participation that day was not good.

I also said that Bobby is a very sensitive and kind boy, and I knew this was an unusual event so I didn't pursue it much further. I went on to say there were some behaviors that I wanted Bobby to work on, and since he responded so well to positives, I wanted to come up with some sort of chart where when he did those positive things, I'd give him a sticker or stamp. At then end of the week, he could take the chart home, and she could give him positive feedback too. I invited her to come in to meet with me to organize this.

Her reply came quickly, and I could tell immediately that the anger was gone, although she still questioned whether my expectations for him were "appropriate and reasonable." I emailed back that I had been at his IEP meeting (which was scheduled at a time she requested, then she didn't even show up) and I thought my three expectations were fine, but that I was happy to run the idea by the IP teacher as well.

Her third reply had no anger or distrust in it at all. She'd be so happy to meet me, she said. In fact, we set up a meeting time for after school the next day. I knew the meeting would go well. In fact, when she showed up, she was putty in my hands immediately. She herself is very sensitive, and began crying at first, but then pulled herself together. She apologized for the email she sent. And it was a productive meeting. I think she just wanted to see that I was a good person.

The next day, Friday, Bobby came to school with a sack full of stickers, paper, pencils, etc., that she had bought for me at her new favorite store: The Dollar Store. Before I could send her an email to thank her, this is the email she sent me:

"Did Bobby give you the stickers and the paper if you just wanted to throw them on the paper and call it good that can work. You can use those for other’s too and when you run out let me know and I will go get more for you or if you think of anything let me know and I will go pick it up, don’t buy anything I will buy it!!!! I am really glad to have met you and appreciate your time thank you for caring about my son!!! He seemed allot better about everything last night too so it was a good thing I came and we got to meet…….I thought you were going to have warts and a broom LOL just kidding you are a very great teacher and I have SO MUCH RESPECT for your role in my child’s life"

Now, that's what I call a Success Story!

It All Makes Sense Now!

Yesterday our preschool teacher shared that she had sent a parent letter home the other day, and thought she should mention all about the "fire drill" we had that turned into a marriage proposal. This teacher said she got two emails back from parents, one just saying what a sweet story it was.

The other parent thanked the teacher for the explanation about the fire drill. She said her daughter had come home and told her that they had had a fire drill that day, and that the firemen came, and one fireman kissed a girl...

Grow Up!

And I do get to move three boys out of my class, and I get two girls. The move will happen next week Thursday. Two of the three boys I'm moving are ones I wanted to move. I wasn't allowed to give away the third one I wanted. I had to pick another. So I chose a student who is very quiet, but not a leader. I need any leader I can keep. I hate to see a quiet one go, though.

One of the boys who I will be moving is of average smarts, but is so loud and blurts out constantly. I can't wait to get rid of him. My life will be easier.

Ms. 4/5 Teacher, who has been spending the last month with only 10 children for the first three hours of the day, has told me she's already looking for other work. I know she talked last year of quitting teaching. But she says she didn't quit just because of how this year was supposed to work for her, with only teaching half her class all morning long. I am not impressed at all by this attitude. Did she really think that she could go all year long with a schedule like this? And why did she think she was so deserving of this special treatment? This is public school.

Finally, I do feel sorry for any of her students. Her class will go through a major change next week, with her split being disbanded. Then half her class will be new. That's a hard thing; I did it four years ago. You start over again. So if she adds to that by quitting? Those poor kids. Plus my other teammate is slated to be leaving and moving out of state in December. My class will be the only stable one.

And Ms. 4/5 Teacher doesn't vote. She says she is a political atheist. I don't have any respect for someone who doesn't vote.

I can't wait for Thursday!

Just Doing My Job

Yesterday I taught my 5th graders how to make a "factor tree." In their math book, they were supposed to be able to write the "factor sting" of a number-so they were to break a number down into it's factors until you had only prime numbers. But the way the book was set up, they were given a number, and then just expected to be able to write the string of prime factors. So all that work had to be done in their heads. I didn't think that they could do it in their heads; this isn't a strong math group. Plus, they needed practise getting numbers to their prime factorization first.

So I taught them how to make Factor Trees. And they loved it. I taught it to them as if it was the world's best invention! And they caught on so quickly.

I then showed them how once you get a number down to its prime factorization, you can write the prime numbers using exponents if applicable. For instance, if there ends up being three 2s, you can write that as 2 to the third power. So we worked on that for awhile.

At then end of our math time, when I had given the students their assignment, Adrian said to me, "I just feel so much smarter now!"

From Fire Drill Bells To Wedding Bells

This morning, when I went to pick up my kids first thing, one of my boys was talking to one of the recess teachers, and she was writing on a Behavior Slip. I sighed, and got my class. As the one student entered, he hands me the slip. I noted that three other boys in my class had been verbally harrassing him, calling him "fat" and "terrorist." I asked him what the recess teacher did about it. He said that she told him to give me the note. Great.

So when recess came, I kept in the three boys for a talking. Now, I really disapprove of them calling the other middle-eastern student "terrorist." And all three boys in question were of different races that too could be made fun of. So I talked very seriously to them. I knew it wasn't a one-way street; that the other boy had played a part, too. But he was the only one who reported it. So the three boys were the ones caught.

Anyway, I was just finishing up my lecture, and I was preparing to give a wrap up, when the fire drill bell went off. I was surprised, because we have never had a fire drill during recess. I figured either someone pulled the alarm, or they wanted to see how the kids reacted when at an unstructured moment. So I told the three boys to hurry on out and get in line.

Once outside on the field in our designated spot, I began to take roll. I heard the siren of a fire engine, so I knew this was no drill. After all of my students were accounted for, I held up my green "OK" sign.

Soon, about 5 or 6 firemen come from out of the building area, and walk toward us at the field. One is carrying a large cardboard box and shouts out, "Ms. Teacher in ELL? We found this package in your room right next to the heater."

She sheepishly came forward to the firemen. The one holding the box pulls out a dozen red roses. Another fireman goes up to her, falls onto one knee, and pulls something out of his pocket.

A huge "Aw!" arose from the crowd, both kids and adults alike, as we realized that it was a proposal taking place, and we were witnesses to it all! Then we all just burst into applause as Ms. Teacher and Mr. Fireman kissed and hugged in front of the whole school.

What a way to start the day! We all headed back into class, and we all had big smiles on our faces!

What can you do after a unique, shared experience like that? Why, write about it, of course! We began to plan it right away: it's a fabulous story with a beginning, middle, and end. These kids will never see anything like that again! And when the stories are finished I will give them to Ms. Teacher and Mr. Fireman, and they can share them with their own children, and read them again on their 50th wedding anniversary.

I wish I had married a romantic.

Reality Bites

Last year I couldn't stand my class. I was so excited when the year was over, and so excited for a new year to start. I wasn't going to be teaching a split this year, which was huge. Plus, I was teaching 5th grade this year, not sixth, so no snotty girls. Well, the reality of my class hit quick.

My class is overloaded with boys, and many with real behavior problems. I'm just so worn out from dealing with them. Today an argument broke out between two of my boys in class...I was speechless, and I didn't know what to do. I just am struggling with the behavior. On the plus side, our principal is finally disbanding the two split classes, and combining the two fifth grade groups to make up our third straight 5th. How this benefits me is that she'll reconfigure some of the kids, and make sure that the three classes are have the same distribution of girls and boys, even though this class as a whole is heavily boys. But, this will give me two more girls, and I get to get rid of three boys.

One will be one of the students who disrupted class with his petty argument today. He's a smart boy, but acts like a prince. He has blatently argued with me in front of the class before.

Another boy I'm getting rid of is one who was kicked out of our school in SECOND GRADE! He then went to a neighboring district, where he was kicked out last year, apparently. Now he's back, but I already have a real behavior problem boy (who is nicer, however...). One's enough. I asked my principal yesterday, "Am I the only 5th grade teacher who has boys with such bad behavior problems that I have to keep anecdotal notes on?" Apparently I am.

The third boy I'm getting rid of is of average smarts, but is noisy and blurts out constantly, so he's gone. If all goes in my favor, that is.

I hope this will be enough of a change that it will positively affect the climate of my class. I hope the girls I get are not snots.

I'm not happy with my chosen profession right now. Ironically, my husband says, "Then do something else. Why be miserable?" Sure, that's what he did when he decided to become a teacher, which in my view is the root of why I ended up leaving my good district for this poor one. I blame him. And now he makes pennies. I'm the main wage-earner, and he talks about me just throwing in the towel and doing something else? I never realized how irresponsible he was.