Blue Ribbon-Gate

I was totally excited today when I realized I have yet another "-Gate" story to tell...

At my school, one of the inumerable "programs" my principal has begun that we have to do is to set regular Blue Ribbon Goals with our students. The students work towards that goal, and when they meet their goal, the teacher sends out an email to the whole staff in celebration and recognition of this achievement. My class has earned three Blue Ribbon Goals so far this year: One for earning their first Good Behavior Reward, one for earning 20 Awesome tickets from various staff members, and one for over 50% of the class turning in their monthly reading logs on time.


On Friday my class, who is very well behaved, earned their 20th Awesome Ticket for the second time. I then sent out the email to all staff, proclaiming our good news, and bundled up the 20 Awesome Tickets, and turned them into the office. On Monday, a small blue ribbon with a "20" in the middle was in my mailbox. But, on the bulletin board in the office, where all can see everyone's total blue ribbons, there were only three Blue Ribbons after my name. I got back into class and sent our office manager an email, cc'ing the rest of the office staff, informing her that we had just earned our fourth Blue Ribbon, so it needed to be reflected on the office bulletin board.


Today, the day before winter break, I was told to lug all of my unsold coffee for the outdoor education camp down to the office. Of course, my 5th graders didn't sell any, or rather, the one student who did sell coffee got her coffee supply from the office, and not the classroom. Therefore, I had to lug 61-one pound bags of coffee to the office (why they couldn't have remained in my room, where they were safely locked up in a cabinet, is beyond me). As I was leaving the office, I saw on the Blue Ribbon bulletin board that there were still just three little blue ribbons for my class. I gestured up to the bulleting board, and said, "I still need one more ribbon up there. My class has earned four Blue Ribbons so far this year."


"That is still in debate," my office manager replied.


"What?" I asked, incredulously.


"Yes. It is still being debated by the Big Boss," she clarified.


Now wait just a frickin' minute. You really mean to tell me that there is a heated debate going on as to whether I really have three or four Blue Ribbons? Do they think I am scamming Blue Ribbons? Yes. You know I go to bed each night, plotting exactly how I can trick the office out of more Blue Ribbons.


Who the hell cares whether I actually have three or four? If I was respected, the fourth ribbon would be put up. No questions. No debates. This is why I'm going to try to get a job somewhere else after this year.