Detective Work

So, a parent complained to Mr. Principal that I do not send home notices on time...That's what Mr. Principal told me. I admitted that there may be times when I slipped up, but most likely I wasn't that bad...But as things alwasy do, it continued to bug me. Who could have called and complained? What parent doesn't feel comfortable enough with me to just send me an email? I pride myself on the relationships I build with parents. So I went home and continued to think about it. At our school, office staff and PTA are trying very hard to go paperless. That is tough to do when not all families have computers, or if they do, not all have internet access. So we have a "Red Dot" system. If a family does not have a computer or internet access, then the youngest sibling in the family or only sibling in the family gets a hard copy. A teacher is given a stack of handouts, with a red sticker on the top copy. This is our signal that the handouts go to the "Red Dot" families. When I get a "Red Dot" stack, I just say to the kids when I pass out papers, "OK-Every Red Dot Kid come get a handout!" I can't keep track of who the kids are. They file up, grab a handout, and sit back down or get ready to go home. It seems that I always have a few handouts left over. But I can't help that. I can't force a kid to take a handout, nor do I really care. I also do not put the handout in their backpack for them, nor do I go home with them to ensure that the handout gets delivered to the parent. That is not my job. I began to ponder whose mom complained to Mr. Principal. It had to be a Red Dot Kid. I began to try to think of who the Red Dot Kids were. It could be Johnny's mom, I thought. She wasn't happy with me at conference time, because her son, who is apparently gifted (although I don't see it) wasn't turning in his monthly reading logs. He didn't even take home his report card to show her when I sent them home the previous week. That, of course, was my fault, she said. It had to be her. I went to Mr. Principal. "Was it Johnny's monm?" I asked. "Johnny is not very responsible. He didn't even bring home his report card to give to his mom when I handed them out." "No," Mr. Principal replied. "It wasn't Johnny's mom. It was a girl." Hmm...A girl. It must have been Cindy. Her mom was unhappy with me at conference time because I didn't give Cindy any 4s. Of course, Cindy didn't earn any 4s, but that's beside the point. I should have given Cindy 4s. So I decided to trick Mr. Principal into admitting that it was Cindy's mom who complained. The next day I got to school and went into the office. I poked my head into Mr. Principal's office. "So, did you speak with Cindy's mom yet?" I asked innocently. But Mr. Principal just looked at me blankly. "oh. I guess it wasn't Cindy's mom who called..." I said. Mr. Principal just laughed and said no. I went into the library to the meeting that was being run by Ms. Education Assisstant, but my mind was still trying figure out who complained. I needed to know. I sent Mr. Principal another email. "Was it Jan's mom?" I asked. He replied back no. I really was running out of ideas as to who it would be. I had guessed all Red Dot Kids whose parents might have not felt comfortable coming to me. After the meeting, Mr. Principal came into the library. "I have to know who it is," I said. "It is driving me crazy." I also needed to know, and the parent also had said to Mr. Principal that when she asked me for ideas on how to help her kid, my response was vague and not helpful. That is the part that I didn't like to hear. I don't care if I slip up on handouts from time to time, but boy, I sure don't want parents thinking I can't offer helpful suggestions. That's my job. I also was slightly irritated that a parent would assume that their child is so totally responsible, that if a handout doesn't get home in time, it is the teacher's fault and not the child. The child is more responsible than I? That made me mad. But Mr. Principal gave me the clue I needed, even though he didn't realize it. He said that the mom mentioned something about getting a cheerleading handout late, and I knew who it was right away. I knew, because back in January (yes, that long ago)I had sent some papers and fliers home (we are supposed to send all handouts home on Thursdays), and the Aunt, who is the English speaker at the house, emailed me, asking me about all the handouts and the dates on them which were very soon and she didn't have much time to get it all organized...The Aunt was stressed. At the time, I told her that those were PTA handouts, and I couldn't really help her with them. I just get them in my box, and send them home when I get them. So the minute Mr. Principal said "cheerleading," I knew that it was Maria's Aunt. "It's Maria, right?" I said. Mr. Principal then admitted that it was Maria. "Well, I continued, "Do you know anything about Maria's homelife?" He said no. "Maria and her family moved here from New York right after Thanksgiving. They moved in with their Aunt and Uncle. The Aunt is American. Maria's mom is dying of cancer, and will go back to El Salvador when she is ready to die. Maria will just stay with the Aunt. The Aunt knows that she will become Maria's mother. I met the Aunt, whom I found very likable, but all of the suddent the Aunt is the mom of a school age kid. And I think she is stressed." I went to my room and glanced in Maria's messy desk. I saw a few handouts, and pulled them out. Yes, they were out of date already. When Maria got to school, I sent her to the office to get a Take Home Folder. Now I watch her like a hawk, and whenever I pass anything out, I make sure she had her folder out and ready. But I was unhappy that the Aunt told Mr. Principal that I had not been helpful when she asked how to support Maria's education. I emailed Mr. Principal. I told him that I had recommended several book series for Maria, and encouraged the Aunt to read to Maria and take her to the local library. I told the aunt that my goal for Marian was to write a complete sentence, and that she could help Maria at home with that. I told her that for math I wanted Maria to practice her basic math facts at home. I also had a small group of three students who met with me after school a few times prior to our Science Fair and we did a project together. I told Mr. Principal that I had indeed given the aunt specific helpful suggestions about how to help support Maria. He must have agreed, as he never brought it up again. As well, the aunt never contacted me. Mr. Principal did let it slip that I figured out who it was. She must have been too embarrassed.