Living on the Edge

Knock Me Over With a Feather!

2012-02-10T05:29:00.001-08:00

Because of our school's fabulous test results on the state science test, and because the former "science guru" at our building left, I am now the new Science Guru. That means more work for me to do, but no extra money. One thing that I now have to do is to be the staff liason for the Science Fair. Our former science guru began the science fair about three years ago. Now it is my turn, with Mr. Principal wanting to revamp many aspects of it.

One thing Mr. Principal did was to send an electronic copy of a Science Fair packet he got from some other school district. He sent the link to me, to the other 5th grade teacher, and to some of the instructional people at our school. He told Mrs. Other 5th Grade Teacher and myself to look at the packet and tweak it for our use. Since I had always hated the packet we used that was created by Ms. Former Science Guru, I was eager to design the packet my way.

The first step was to go meticulously through the packet, and I made notes about parts I'd change. Later, Ms. Other 5th Grade Teacher and myself met after school one day to start making changes on formatting, wording, and everything we felt needed to be changed to make it really aligned with the state science standards for inquiry science. Still, in an hour's time we only got one small portion completed.

Then the snow hit, followed by an ice storm, and school was canceled for a good week. When we got back to school, having lost a lot of time to make changes to the packet, and the Science Fair date already set in March and looming on the horizon, I knew the packet needed to be finished. I ended up staying late after school and just worked through the rest of the packet. I was pretty proud of my work. I tweaked the examples for the different parts of the inquiry process (question, prediction, materials, procedure, variables, and conclusion) making them all refer to a hypothetical experiment (Does the type of music played have an effect on how much a plant will grow?). The best part was my conclusion example, where I made it say that Classical music had a better effect on plant growth than Rap music...But I digress.

Yesterday Mr. Principal sent out the completed packet to the whole staff, saying he had sent it already to the print shop, and he thanked me in the email for doing all the work to the packet. I was home yesterday because I went to a doctor about my sore elbow (and got a steroid shot-ouch), but I replied to him right away, as I had envisioned that there would be a packet for primary grades, and a packet for intermediate grades, so that it would be less overwhelming. Less paper and less cost, too. He replied back that yes, he did already send the packet off. He loved that packet, and it was worth every penny.

And here's the part that blew me away..."...worth every penny, just like you," he said...Sort of nice in a creepy sort of way, especially considering all the grief I give him with union stuff. At least when I ask him for a reference letter, I don't think he'll write negative things. So that is good. I'll take the creepy comments.

This and That

2012-01-31T18:37:00.000-08:00

A little bit of everything...

*On the way to school the other day, my 16 year old said to me, "Do you know what I want to do when I turn 18?"

"No," I replied.

"I want to order something off tv! You have to be 18 or older!" she exclaimed.

"Oh. How will you pay for it?" I inquired.

"I could use your credit card..." she replied.

So much for being grown up.

*The other day I took my kids to library. After kids check out their books, they sit at tables. The librarian has picture books stacked in the middle of each table for kids to look at if they don't have a book to read. I passed one table and heard Cindy giggle. I stopped to see what she found so amusing. "Look," she said, indicating to one of the picture books, "It's called The Grapes of Math!" She laughed some more.

Intrigued, I asked her why she thought that was so funny. "Because," she replied, "Grapes can't do math!"

I agreed that was funny, but told her I thought the title had more to do with the fact that there was a classic book called The Grapes of Wrath...That was probably it...But maybe she was right!

*I have a student whose mom and maternal grandmother are at odds with each other. I don't know all the details, except the mom tells me that her mom lied to her for years, claiming that she, the grandmother, had custody of the girl. Why the mom believed that for four years, or why it even got to that point (had the mom been in jail at some point) is beyond me...But it is a continual battle between the two grown women. So today I got an email from the grandmother, requesting a copy of the report card that is due to come out. Now I knew she didn't have custody, and probably wanted to use it to her advantage. I emailed Mr. Principal, who said our school only gives report cards to the custodial family(ies). I replied to grandma and told her that.

But the funny part about her original email was this ps:"...I used to visit non perfessionally (sic) with a Kathy Smith (insert my last name) who was a therapist and she also worked with the gifted program for Washington Elementary Schools; any relation? She would be 60 or older and is a very tiny woman..."

Too funny! If I was related to her, I'd know her. It doesn't matter how old she is, or how big...Oh! The tiny woman! Yes! Our family has been wondering what happened to her...!

Science Fair-gate

2012-01-12T20:35:00.000-08:00

Yup. Another.

So, the teacher who has been our "Science guru" left at the end of last year. Given that my last year's teaching partner and myself led our students to getting the highest science scores in the district last year, as well as the highest scores ever at our school, we are now the science gurus. So last Friday I got an email from Mr. Principal. He had attached a Science Fair packet. We have had a Science Fair at our school for the past two or three years now. Until this year, it was organized by the gal who left and PTA. This year Mr. Principal wanted to make changes, and he put me as the staff contact person. Which made it seem strange when I got the email last Friday, with the packet attachment, saying, "Ms. 5th grade teacher (but not me) and I met to discuss the attached Science Fair packet. Look it over and get back to me with comments, so we can make it our own..."

But, I woke early Saturday, swallowed my pride, and began to look carefully at the packet. I saw many things that I would change, so I made notes as I looked at each page. When finished, I sent my notes back to Mr. Principal and everyone else who was cc'd.

On Monday, there was an email sent from Ms. Intervention Specialist, with notes from the Pack Leadership meeting she had attended at our school. At the Pack Leadership meeting, which I don't go to since I don't get paid, Mr. Principal talked about the Science Fair, saying exactly where to find the student packet, and that all experiments would be done in class. This unleashed a flurry of emails from teachers, astounded that they'd have to supervise 25 experiments in their classrooms. This is so typical of Mr. Principal. He makes these executive decisions, without giving thought to the practicality of the classroom (has he really forgotten that part?).

So I see these emails, and I think, "What happened?" Just a few days earlier I got the packet to make suggestions. Who made up the packet? Emails ensued:

Ms. Fourth Grade Teacher: Hi Ladies,2 questions from the PACK minutes... 1. For the Science Fair project...it has to be done all at school?? Is the school providing the material? Who is cleaning up the mess????What about those kids who's parents help them? Is this what you are trying to avoid? How are they going to write up their boards? Do we have to give them access to computers to type things up? Who is going to PRINT their information for them?Do you realize how much time this will take in our classroom? We can barely fit other things and we have to fit in the Science Project? Plus, I would imagine that spending 30 minutes only, each time you want to work on a project would make it hard to do... The materials, the mess and the time away from other classroom studies is my big concern. Just curious how this was decided.

Me (to Mr. Principal): I’m a bit confused…On Friday, I got an email asking for input on the science fair packet. I gave input. Now, the whole staff has been given info about where to get the packet, science fair due dates, etc. I am under the impression that the packet issue has not been resolved. Please let me know if this is not so, otherwise, now that the whole staff has been told where it is, they may be finding the wrong packet…

Mr. Principal (to me): You have very inaccurate info. I posted the sample and shared that you have made great suggestions and that 5th grade would work on updating the packet. Not sure on your source, but they have it very wrong. Sorry about that, but glad you checked in! I love your suggestions, BTW.

Me (to Mr. Principal): I don’t have inaccurate info. Ms. Fourth Grade Teacher has already sent out two emails that seem to be putting staff into a panic. Can you help reel in the people involved? I think we need to first concentrate on a workable packet. If you like the idea of a separate primary and intermediate packet, then Ms. Other 5th Grade Teacher and I could sit down to make changes. It’s feeling like too many chefs spoiling the broth, here…

Ms. Intervention Specialist: I just sent the email out to those at the Pack Leadership, or those missing from Pack Leadership, so it’s not an all staff thing yet. I was note taker for the meeting, and just typed as I heard info. I just sat and talked w/ Ms. Family and Community Coordinator, and we are thinking since we don’t have a PTA point person on this, that we would be willing to sit down w/ everyone involved w/ the Science Fair (you, PTA folks who are willing/able to help, Mr. Principal) and work on what we want in the packet, what our expectations are, how the PTA can help, etc. Mr. Principal did have a mtg with Ms. Family and Community Coordinator and Ms. PTA President to talk about some specifics, needs and ideas. Ms. PTA President has reached out to Ms. Staff Science Fair Contact (me) via e-mail to set up a mtg time, but not sure if that mtg has been set yet. Not to worry, we WILL get this all figured out!

Me: I am feeling like the science fair group is growing by leaps and bounds, and yet the packet has not been decided on. I am happy to work with it…Maybe the other 5th grade teachers will join me.

Good god. It's no wonder I don't get anything done.

Finally...

2012-01-10T20:58:00.000-08:00

Last week we came back to school from winter break on Wednesday. On Wednesday I checked the Blue Ribbon bulletin board in the office, and there were only three blue ribbons after my name. On Thursday I read Mr. Principal's January letter to the parent community. In the letter he showcased Ms. 6th Grade Teacher's class, the first class to earn five blue ribbons. In the letter, Mr. Principal wrote: Who will be the next class to earn five blue ribbons? I replied to this email that if the office staff was to put up my fourth blue ribbon that my class had earned fair and square, that maybe my class would be the next to earn five blue ribbons...

On Friday, there were still only three Blue Ribbons after my name on the bulletin board in the office. I had vented to just about everybody, and decided that if they could not honor my fourth blue ribbon, I was through supporting Mr. Principal's little Blue Ribbon Goal program.

Yesterday, Monday, I got to school and went into the office to check my mailbox. As I passed by the bulletin board, I noticed that there were four little blue ribbons after my name. "Sweet!" I exclaimed, loudly enough for the office staff to hear my excitement. "Four Blue Ribbons!"

Today, an email went out to the staff from the office. It said that all teachers should check the Blue Ribbon Bulletin Board in the office, and that if they were missing blue ribbons, they were to tell the office staff so that it could be brought up to date.

Thank you.

Crap!

2011-12-21T07:31:00.000-08:00

And I realize that in my agitated state I misspelled "humorous" in the reply I sent. It takes away from the cleverness of it. Bummer.

P,S,

2011-12-21T07:26:00.000-08:00

I did reply this morning to Mr. Principal. I said since I was most definitely not the first teacher in our building to use the 20 Awesome Tickets as a Blue Ribbon Goal, that it still made no sense why I was told by office staff that it was "in debate." But, I continued, this will make a humorous story to share around the Christmas tree...Then I used an exclamation mark.

Email Exchange

2011-12-21T06:28:00.000-08:00

With every sip of wine last night I became more and more irritated with the whole Blue Ribbon-Gate thing. So I sent this email to Mr. Principal:

Last week my class earned our fourth Blue Ribbon
Goal by getting our second batch of 20 Awesome Tickets. This is indeed our
fourth Blue Ribbon Goal that we have met. I was told by the office that this
is under debate, since the
bulletin board in the office still shows me at three Blue Ribbons. I am not
trying to scam Blue Ribbons. Here are the Blue Ribbon Goals we have met so
far:

*For earning our first whole-class good behavior
award
*For earning our first batch of 20 Awesome
Tickets
*For over 50% of the class turning in their
Monthly Reading Log on time

This is our fourth Blue Ribbon that we have
earned this year. I feel disrespected that this is under debate, and amazed
that it is being debated. I would appreciate it if the bulletin board in the
office reflected our achievement. Thanks.

And here is is Mr. Principal's reply:

LOL No scamming going on. You are certainly at 4 blue ribbons. We will update.
I let the gals know because they were confused since Ms. Office Worker also does an award.
I let them know it is up to the teacher if they choose to use Awesome tokens as
a class goal as well.
Thanks for pointing this out! Have a wonderful holiday!

Huh. If his reply is true, then I should have seen that fourth Blue Ribbon on the bulletin board as soon as I pointed it out to the office staff. If his reply is true, then I wouldn't have been told yesterday that it was "in debate." If his reply is true, then this would not have even been an issue since every teacher at our school has claimed a Blue Ribbon Goal for 20 Awesome Tickets. Why was my choice to do the same being questioned all of the sudden? I smell a rat.

Blue Ribbon-Gate

2011-12-20T17:04:00.000-08:00

I was totally excited today when I realized I have yet another "-Gate" story to tell...

At my school, one of the inumerable "programs" my principal has begun that we have to do is to set regular Blue Ribbon Goals with our students. The students work towards that goal, and when they meet their goal, the teacher sends out an email to the whole staff in celebration and recognition of this achievement. My class has earned three Blue Ribbon Goals so far this year: One for earning their first Good Behavior Reward, one for earning 20 Awesome tickets from various staff members, and one for over 50% of the class turning in their monthly reading logs on time.

On Friday my class, who is very well behaved, earned their 20th Awesome Ticket for the second time. I then sent out the email to all staff, proclaiming our good news, and bundled up the 20 Awesome Tickets, and turned them into the office. On Monday, a small blue ribbon with a "20" in the middle was in my mailbox. But, on the bulletin board in the office, where all can see everyone's total blue ribbons, there were only three Blue Ribbons after my name. I got back into class and sent our office manager an email, cc'ing the rest of the office staff, informing her that we had just earned our fourth Blue Ribbon, so it needed to be reflected on the office bulletin board.

Today, the day before winter break, I was told to lug all of my unsold coffee for the outdoor education camp down to the office. Of course, my 5th graders didn't sell any, or rather, the one student who did sell coffee got her coffee supply from the office, and not the classroom. Therefore, I had to lug 61-one pound bags of coffee to the office (why they couldn't have remained in my room, where they were safely locked up in a cabinet, is beyond me). As I was leaving the office, I saw on the Blue Ribbon bulletin board that there were still just three little blue ribbons for my class. I gestured up to the bulleting board, and said, "I still need one more ribbon up there. My class has earned four Blue Ribbons so far this year."

"That is still in debate," my office manager replied.

"What?" I asked, incredulously.

"Yes. It is still being debated by the Big Boss," she clarified.

Now wait just a frickin' minute. You really mean to tell me that there is a heated debate going on as to whether I really have three or four Blue Ribbons? Do they think I am scamming Blue Ribbons? Yes. You know I go to bed each night, plotting exactly how I can trick the office out of more Blue Ribbons.

Who the hell cares whether I actually have three or four? If I was respected, the fourth ribbon would be put up. No questions. No debates. This is why I'm going to try to get a job somewhere else after this year.

We Warned You...

2011-12-17T08:45:00.000-08:00

Earlier this week, all staff in our district received an email from the district office. In the email, it explained that from now on, any computer/tech training for staff was no longer going to occur at the district offices where they had a lab set up. The email went on to explain that from now on tech training was going to happen at a computer lab at our alternative high school, which is open nights for evening courses for students. The alternative high school is located in an area that is known for crime and violence.

The email cautioned us to always make sure we wore our district staff badge, and we were told specifically where to park when we came to the alternative high school for training. But the worst part (and the part that I was astounded to read) was highlighted in red so that we would all see it. It said:

"...When you leave class, be sure to walk in pairs or small groups for safety!"

WTF? I read and reread this statement in disbelief. I wasn't sure what to be more shocked by: the fact that they are assuming our need for trainings and credits will overpower our need for safety? Or was it the somewhat callous way we were told that we'd be in unsafe situations? When I am raped or robbed or murdered as I leave my Smart Board training alone to head to my car that was parked in a lot not designated in the email, will they just shrug and say, "Well, we told her not to do that..."

Their concern for my safety is underwhelming.

More Morning Duty Tales

2011-12-03T17:28:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was my turn for morning duty again. Otherwise known as "Keep the Kids from Killing Each Other Before School Begins!" But of course I'm just kidding...It's not that bad. No one kills anyone...

Actually, it was Pajama Day, and many kids and teachers were dressed in their pajamas. I was not. I sleep in thermal bottoms, a turtle neck, a sweat shirt, and wool socks. I don't really own pajamas. Besides, I hate to be cold, or to be a forced joiner.

But I saw an opportunity for a little fun. Those 1st and 2nd graders are so cute...So I'd go up to a couple of little kids dressed in their pajamas. I'd crouch down to their level, and motion them to come as if I had a secret to tell. They'd come over, and I'd say, in a serious tone, "I think you forgot something this morning..."

"What?" they'd ask.

"You forgot to get dressed this morning!" I whispered.

"But it's Pajama Day," they'd exclaim to me, over and over, as I would pretend to not even know what they were talking about.

"No!" I said. "Pajamas are for sleeping! We are at school to learn, not to sleep! You have to wear school clothes!"

"But it's Pajama Day! Mr. Principal said so!" a little girl said, sporting a toothless smile.

"Ok, if Mr. Principal said it was ok, then I guess it is ok," I conceded.

When I did this to one little boy, he then said to me, "And do you know what? I have my underwear on under these things!"

I told him I thought that was probably a good thing. At long last the bell rang. Morning Duty was over. A job well done.

Duty Fun

2011-11-19T09:05:00.000-08:00

You just gotta do things to either make yourself laugh or make others laugh, or you'r going to go crazy...I had my first "Morning Duty" yesterday. It was cold out!

*I forgot to grab my gloves when I left the house, so when I got to school, I wanted to borrow some gloves from someone so my hands wouldn't freeze, since we are outside supervising for 20 minutes until the bell rings. On Fridays we wear our school spirit wear. I was dressed fairly warm in my black turtle neck and long-sleeve fleece pullover. I was also wearing my college scarf, which I wear on college Wednesdays. But no gloves. So when I got to school I emailed the whole staff. This is what I said, "Staff, I have morning duty and forgot my gloves! If anyone has a pair I can borrow, let me know. I'd prefer black, since that would go best with my outfit." Many people responded, and laughed about my need to color-coordinate...

*My "post" for Morning Duty is on the playground with the 1st and 2nd graders. The little kids are wild, but pretty cute, and since I teach older kids, it's always fun to be around the younger ones. The kids are supposed to stand quietly in line for 20 minutes until the bell, but that is an unrealistic expectation of our principal. In actuality, they run around like chickens with their heads cut off. But I digress...I'm walking around from one "line" of kids to another, trying to encourage them to stand in line and not use their backpacks for weapons. I walk up to one line, and I talk to kids one on one as I slowly walk from the front of the line to the back. Some kids recognize me; some kids are younger siblings of past and/or current students of mine. Then one little boy comes up to me. "Teacher," he says as he holds out his soccer ball, "Look at my ball!"

Discipline-Gate

2011-11-12T08:11:00.000-08:00

Then last week there was Discipline-Gate. It was a "No-School" day for kids, and an optional day for teachers. If teachers came to work, we signed in and got paid a day's pay. The first four hours belonged to the principal, and the last three was our own time. I do not understand why any teacher would not come to work for a day's pay, so I always go.

Like I said, the first four hours belonged to Mr. Principal. We met in the morning in the library with our laptops as we would for any staff meeting. All certificated staff was there except for one teacher (I am not sure why she was not there. My understanding is that she is always in financial trouble. You would think she would take any opportunity to make an extra day's worth of pay. But there you go.). The morning began with our Education Assisstant reading us our list of norms to follow. I hate this. I didn't come up with the norms. They weren't generated by the staff. If this is indeed a list of respectful behaviors we are going to show, then it should have come from us. After she read the norms to us, we have to show thumbs up or thumbs down if we can agree to follow them. Like children. I put my thumb sideways, just because I hate it. Then she read us a story while Mr. Principal had music playing in the background. Oh god, I thought.

That over, I can't remember what happened next, so obviously it was extremely important and life-changing. They were using their iPads, though...But soon we moved to the morning duty schedule (see earlier post on that fiasco). A schedule was presented to the staff where there were the morning duty positions listed for each day of the week, and it was explained that each grade level would be on just one day but every week all year. It was also pointed out that some staff who previously have NOT been on morning duty would now be on the schedule, if in somewhat of a modified form (ie, two Intervention Specialists would share one post...). Finally, I wrote names of the days of the week on slips of paper, and Mr. Principal would toss a day to a team. That was the day they'd get, and the team members would then sign up for the slots they wanted. I went with the fourth grade team, and disappointingly we got Wednesday. But then third grade approached us to change days-they had Friday! Heck yes, we changed! Because in November, only one week actually has school on a Friday! We came out looking pretty good. The response to the new schedule was hesitant, I think. I hope people will like it. We'll see.

Then we moved on to discipline. Now, in our contract (pages 27-29) it talks about our rights as teachers as far as what we have to (and don't have to) put up with in a classroom from a student, and what our rights are if we send a student out of the classroom for behavior. But it is murkier at the elementary...Kids are still learning right from wrong, and classroom teachers are expected to put up with alot. But just two days prior to this meeting, our music teacher came in to my room, angry because one of my 5th grade girls attacked another student and cussed at him. Now that is a white slip in my book, and I told her so. "Write her up," I said. So she did.

Later, she came into my room. "When is you recess?" she asked. I told her and she said, "Well, the white slip was denied, and I was told to handle it myself until it happened six times...So send her to me to write sentences." I did.

The very next day when I went to the office during my break, I see the same student in Mr. Principal's office. Later when she returned to my room, she handed me the pink copy of the white slip. I read that she had attacked a student physically at recess, hitting the student and leaving red marks. It sounded like what had happened the day before in music, but this time the white slip was taken seriously and she was written up.

The question I had, and that I shared at the meeting, was why was the first white slip which was written by a classroom teacher denied, but the next day when the very same behavior was displayed at recess and the recess teacher/office worker wrote her up, it was then taken seriously?

Now, I knew that many teachers lately have had white slips denied or ignored. So yes, I knew I was unleashing some intersting discussion on the topic, and that is what happened. As the teachers began speaking up, I was looking up in our contract the pages (quoted above) that speak to discipline. I then sent it immediately in an email to staff. Mr. Principal and Ms. Education Assisstant were getting hot under the collar, and getting very defensive. But it is true that teachers are not feeling supported when it comes to discipline. I asked, "Why is a student allowed to do something SIX times before it is taken seriously? In the real world he or she won't be given six times before they are arrested..."

I really don't recall what transpired from all of this, except that Mr. Principal knows teachers are unhappy and angry over the lack of follow through in discipline, and it is not following the contract. He swears that the office does support the teachers in discipline, but I think the office does not. We supposedly have a discipline committee, but I just can't figure out what happened to consensus. When I began teaching it was all about staff coming to consensus on issues. Now, at my school, it seems to be small committtees that are making decisions. It drives me crazy. And if I was to bring this up to Mr. Principal, I know what he'd say. He'd say, well, then get on that committee. But exactly how many committees does one need to be on? I'm trying my best to keep teachers aware of their rights, and the contract states specifically that there should only be 8 mandated meetings a month, and no more than two a week. He fills those all ready. We don't need more meetings; what we need is more input into the way the school will be run as it applies to the classroom.

Have I said this yet? I feel like Mr. Principal is a steam roller, and is steam rolling over us all.

Copy-Gate

2011-11-11T11:31:00.000-08:00

The same week as the iPad-Gate we had Copy-Gate. This is when Ms. Office Worker sent out a spreadsheet with every teacher's total of how many copies they have made this year. This was followed up with an email from Mr. Principal, encouraging us to use less copies (we have a 5,000 limit per teacher for the first half of the year), and to "problem solve" with others how to use less.

Now when you are sent a spreadsheet like this, naturally you look at your number of copies and how it compares to others, which, of course, was the intent of this "transparent" method of sharing. This also, in the same week as the iPad email trail, and hurt feelings from that, unleashed a new email trail with defensive and hurt employees.

Teachers felt the need to explain and defend their number of copies. Teachers replied all that their number was high because they have made copies for their whole team more than others. Other teachers replied that their numbers were high because their math curriculum demands lots of copying for worksheets and tests. Other replied all that they truly believed there was a mistake made and that from now on they would keep track of their copies and compare it to the office's record...So much unhappiness, blame, bad feelings, and justifications.

Me? I make as little copies as possible, as I like to save trees, not that I care about looking good on the spreadsheet. But if I reach my limit? The too bad. No more tests. I will not go out and pay for copies at Office Depot. I refuse to spend my money in that manner. I wonder if it is like this everywhere? We have the crappiest teacher workroom ever, with only one copy machine for the whole staff (although the office, I think, has two? At least they have one for the 4-7 people there...).

What an unhappy place I work at.

Scandal

2011-11-11T11:11:00.000-08:00

You've lived through or heard of Watergate, right? Well, at our school we have had our share of "scandals."

"iPad-Gate"-This occured when one of our special ed teachers innocently sent out a link to the "60 Minutes" episode that featured teachers using iPads with
children with Autism. They could use apps for communicating, and this was very successful. Another teacher "replied all" to the innocent email, stating that it was unfortunate that our administration saw it fit to provide administrators with iPads (because apparently their compters and laptops weren't enough), while students who could benefit went without. This unleased a whole back-and-forth email trail between certain staff members and the admin at our school.

Our principal, who blames a huge part of our staff's unrest on the union, not realizing his part in this, sent an email chastising this teacher's response as being uninformed, and that it was "sad" to see rumors spread in this manner. This made said teacher, who seemed to me to be a big union supporter, aplogize profusely (something I would NOT have done). I never did add my two-cents worth in this conversation, although I had thought that our tech guy said that there was indeed an "iPad Cart" at the administration building for anyone's use (as long as you worked in the admin building...not for teachers to check out and use). It's also true that my principal has one or two computers in his office, plus a laptop, and an iPad. How many pieces of similar technology does one need? Finally, in his reply defending the purchase of iPads, he said that he used "his" technology money to purchase three iPads for our building. Three? Where are they?

Well, the funniest reply came from one of the Self-Contained teachers who works with the primary kids. She said, "I'm just so excited to find out that there are three iPads in our building! I have several non-communicative students who would greatly benefit from the use of iPads. Where are they, and how do I get on the list to check them out?" I replied back to her: Well, I can tell you where two of the three are. One is in Mr. Principal's office. One is in Mrs. Education Assisstant's office. I don't know where the third one would be...

Interestingly enough, at our next staff meeting both Mr. Principal and Mrs. Education Assisstant had their iPads and were using them to run the meeting. Showing us, I guess, that they needed them, not the classrooms.

I'm still trying to get the facts on who has iPads and why at the district level. I've asked Ms. Union President for facts. Mr. Principal wants facts, not rumors. So when I get some facts, I plan on sharing with all.

Morning Duty

2011-10-22T07:45:00.000-07:00

So, if you haven't already realized this, I am the union rep for our building. The reason I got so heavily involved with the union is that when I came to this district six years ago, I was amazed at what I had stepped in to. I came from a district that paid well. That was my biggest (and still remains so) problem with this distict. When I got my first paycheck, and it was my first full-time paycheck in ten years, I was excited to see a large sum. What I saw was about equivalent to what I had been making half-time in my previous district. I began to delve into our pay, and found pay schedules from other districts, not just my previous one. All were better. And at my New Hire orientation we were told that we had "one of the best contracts in the state!" I began to send emails to our then-union president, asking how we had one of the best contracts in the state if I just took a huge pay cut. He soon stopped replying to my emails. At the end of the year, a new two year contract was passed by teachers without a blink of an eye. The crappy pay remained, and no one seemed to realize or care. However, a new union president was elected. I moved schools and became the union rep. The union's goal, under the new president, was to inform our members. Slowly, teachers began to see that things were not good. And movement happened, including a strike a few years ago. I felt hopeful that teachers were beginning to pay attention and demand better.

Things are still not great. One of the things that teachers have to do in this district that I never had to do since I started to teach in 1987 is morning duty. Our student day begins at 9:30, and kids can arrive to school at 9:10. That's when buses drop them off in the morning. There are six morning duty posts that teachers must fill: three playground posts, one post to help with breakfast, one post at bus drop off, and one post at parent drop off. Now, I haven't had morning duty since being a rep-this is in the contract that a rep might not have extra duty if the building supported it. Mr. Principal ran a survey, and 18 teachers said I shouldn't have duty, and 4 said I should. But because the number of duty weeks for a given teacher had increased by a week this year (I think an extra post was added on the playgound), I was getting angry emails from teachers about morning duty.

Because not everyone had morning duty. I looked at the Morning Duty Roster, and compared it with my union members list. Including me, there were 12 names on my union list that didn't have to do morning duty. That is a lot, and if eveyone (including me) did morning duty, it would bring it down for all. I sent an email to Mr. Principal about this. He was surprised that there were so many, and asked who they were. I replied that first I wanted to bring it up with the union members to see if it was an issue they wanted me to pursue. But before I could bring it up tactfully, it came out at a union meeting we had last week with our union president. And unfortunately all of the special ed teachers felt attacked, as basically they were the ones not on the rotation. By the end of the day, I had been visited by at least two of the special ed teachers who had felt attacked in some way.

Well. Sorry. But if you don't have kids before school, as our Self Contained preschool class does, then you need to help out. Including me. After school I had a chat with Mr. Principal. I told him that teachers are upset in that their morning duty supervision had increased by a week. All teachers now had 12 weeks of morning duty, and some lucky ones had 13. I said how much of a hardship it is to have morning duty for a full week the 20 minutes right up until the start of the school day. We looked at the list of teachers who weren't on the morning duty roster (including me). Some of those teachers were not responsible for morning duty, in that they are at several schools. So those were out. Others, like our preschool class, had kids coming in as early as 8:15, so that teacher already did morning supervision of her kids. That made sense not to have her in the morning duty rotation. But our two Education Assisstants? Well, Mr. Principal said, they need to be available in the morning to meet with teachers if necessary. Well, I said, the teachers would really appreciate if they saw that the Education Assisstants were helping out. And why can't the two of them count as one teacher? Then it frees them up an awful lot, but also helps with reducing the number of weeks for the rest of us. And while we're at it, why can't the two Integrated Program teachers, who don't have kids before school but do have a lot of meetings (of which they receive a stipend of $3000.00 for) also count as one teacher?

Mr. Principal actually liked that idea. Things are in the works. But our staff is like a simmering pot that is getting ready to boil over. I wonder when that will happen? It's not a happy place.

Math Problem

2011-10-18T20:21:00.001-07:00

The question on the quiz was about making combinations. Here was the question: Emily is making snack bags. She has 3 different kinds of fruit-apples, oranges, and bananas. She has 4 different kinds of crackers-butter, cheese, wheat, and sesame. Each snack bag will have one kind of fruit and one kind of cracker. How many different kinds of snoack bags can Emily make? What are they?

Student's answer: apples and butter crackers, apples and cheese crackers, apples and wheat crackers, lastly, apples and sesame crackers. oranges and butter crackers, oranges and cheese crackers, oranges and wheat crackers, lastly, oranges and sesame crackers. Bananas and butter crackers, bananas and cheedse crackers, bananas and wheat crackers, lastly, bananas and sesame crackers. Emily can make 12 different snack crackers. Very exausting (sic).

But thorough.

Narcs

2011-10-06T04:52:00.000-07:00

That's what we called kids who tattled in the 70's: Narcs! We have a few "informers" on staff who are union members who must be going right to Mr. Principal with every email I send. Or more likely they are trying to score points by forwarding to him every email I send. I think I'm careful about what I say in my emails, though, and don't make personal comments.

One email received from Mr. Principal had to do with the meetings. He began, "I've heard that there are grumblings about the number of meetings I have scheduled. The contract says I can have up to 8 a month..." Yes, Mr. Principal, we all know that because I have been telling everyone that. You are fine with the number of meetings according to contract. It's the four additional meetings that Ms. Education Assistant asked us to add to our plate (per your request, though, I'm sure). But you know darned well no one "grumbled" to him...They grumbled to me, and there were emails going out to staff from me about required meetings. Someone forwarded them to Mr. Principal, I'm sure.

In a way, why not? As long as I watch what I say, which is often hard for me to do when I feel wronged. I'm otherwise tactful and I don't like to hurt people's feelings or say things to offend. But I do believe in fairness, and the contract is there for a reason.

When I left school yesterday, I walked past Ms. Education Assistant's office. Mr. Principal was also there. I walked past, as it was late and I wanted to get home. Mr. Principal called out hello. So I said hello. We exchanged pleasantries. Then he hits me with, "Now, is there anything in the contract about when you can and can't conduct union business?" At first I thought he was referring to holding meetings, which I rarely do because they are poorly attended (we are meeting-ed out, and I can do it by email). But we do have a meeting scheduled for October 18 with our union president. I think it will be a bitch session (If Ms. Education Assisstant comes, there will most likely be less bitching...). I told Mr. Principal that I wasn't aware of anything, and that as far as I knew and had heard in the past, as long as it didn't interfere with our job, any time was ok. He shook his head and said boy, it wasn't like that in his former district (then go back, I wanted to say...).

As I drove home I reflected on that comment. Why was it said in the first place? What transpired to bring this up? Was he just referring to meetings, or to emails? I often send out emails if I sit for five minutes and can get one off. Did someone say to Mr. Principal that Ms. Building Union Rep is sending out emails during times when she should be teaching? I think that is highly likely. Ms. Education Assistant is a union member and so gets emails I send. And even though most staff doesn't like Mr. Principal, there are still those brown-nosers who are just trying to get brownie points.

That's why I quite Face Book. I'm unhappy, and when I get a glass of wine, my tongue gets loosened. Some of my "friends" from work may take advantage of that. I hope I can get through this year.

Those Narcs.

Meetings

2011-10-06T04:25:00.000-07:00

Actually, I woke at 1:30, and haven't been able to fall back asleep. This is how it has been this year, and it's only been a month of school. I just do not see how I'm going to last, and I worry that I won't be able to move on somewhere else next year. After all, who do I ask for a reference letter? Why Mr. Principal and Ms. Education Assisstant! And for some reason, I have fallen out of their favor.

Not for "some reason," I guess. I do know the reason. I am the building's union rep. I take that position seriously. I have a strong sense of fairness,and when I came to my current district from my former district, and saw many bad things happening with teacher rights and responsibilities, I became involved in the union. I was never a strong union supporter in my former district; I really didn't pay too much attention to it. But here? I have.

Therefore, when teachers bring up issues to me, I bring it up to Mr. Principal. He won't listen to me unless I have the contract to back me up. But when I do, I will stay with it! And so, even though I helped our school get its highest science scores ever, and even though I took the split with hardly the blink of an eye, I have fallen out of favor. Plus, being a split, I don't really "plan with" the fourth or the fifth; I'm kind of in a spot to myself, which is a place I've never liked being. I like planning with others. And my former teammate was so driven and would spend her free time creating wonderful assessments. I miss that.

So, according to contract, a principal can have no more than two meetings a week, and no more than 8 a month. And our Mr. Principal is living this to the fullest! He has us coming to meetings Tuesday and Thursday mornings. Most months have 6-8 meetings scheduled; if any months have less, it's because he couldn't cram in any more around vacations or weeks before conferences when he can't have meetings...The majority of the meetings are a waste of time. The meetings have different labels, but they all are us having to listen to him. And listen. And listen.

Then the other week, Ms. Education Assistant who dreams of being a principal but is still at a teacher status and is also one of my union members, sent out an email with a calendar attached. He email asked for teams to add to the calendar when they will be meeting weekly.

Whoa! If we are being asked to place regular meetings on a calendar, then that adds to whatever meetings Mr. Principal has all ready scheduled. If he has 7 meetings scheduled all ready for that month, and you expect us to meet weekly with our team, than that puts us way over the 8 meetings per month. Can't you see that? If it has to go on a calendar, that makes it official, and it is a meeting.

No, Ms. Education Assistant couldn't see that. In fact, in her reply to me, she went "grrrr..." at the end of the email. She growled at me! God. And I liked her, too. How could she do something so disrespectful? She eventually sort of apologized, but you know, she wouldn't growl at my former teammate. She is only growling at me because, as the union rep, I'm the one speaking up for all!

I am not against teaming and planning together. That's how I want to teach. But Mr. Principal has us doing so many useless things that any planning has to be on the fly. I would be much happier if Mr. Principal had ony one meeting a week, and let us have one meeting a week to get with our team.

I'm just so frustrated that I haven't been sleeping well.

Reality Sets In

2011-10-05T18:49:00.000-07:00

What was that song by The Rascals? I loved it..."How Can I be sure, In a world, that's constantly changing..."

My song is "Where Did It Go Wrong..." Sung to the same tune, I think. But not as sweet.

Where do I begin? Not sure. The year started out great with us finding out that our students last year scored the highest on the state science test in our district-and that is out of like 23 elementaries (we are the fourth largest district in our state). So I was pumped for the year! Great science scores last year! My teammate and I were an awesome team! And we had 31 and 32 kids on our class roster....Oh, no.

So a split classroom had to be created. Out of the teachers being affected, only I had taught both 4th and 5th grade. I asked Mr. Principal, who do you want to teach it? His reply was me-(or you...you know what I mean...). So I said sure, I'll teach it.

Then the nightmare began. We had meetings and meetings to make this happen. I had to give up 19 fifth graders. It wasn't hard to give some of them up. I kept 12 fifth graders. And to my credit, I didn't keep the smartest ones. Just nice ones. Some very smart, some not so. My 19 kids who left were sad to go (I think). My 12 remaining fifth graders sort of moved up into the first few rows in my room.

And my 12 fourth graders came in. Wildly. Loudly. There seemed to be mostly small, loud boys...Oh, no, I thought. And of course the only spots were further towards the back or in the last row. This was a Wednesday at the end of the day. I vowed to moved kids after school, but many things came up to prevent me from doing this.

The next day we were still in the same seats with most of the 4th graders towards the back. And they seemed to not have any manners at all. There was one very loud girl. And it seemed that were about 5 loud boys. Half of the fourth graders who came in seemed loud and obnoxious without any manners. I threatened to move desks, but after school, again, it didn't happen. I felt like I was drowning.

Finally, on Monday before school, I moved kids around. I intermixed the fourth graders with the fifth graders. I kept brighter kids towards the back, but also moved a kid up front regardless of brightness. One boy who had been driving me crazy the past three days, and actually seemed pretty bright, was moved into the first row. I began a new week.

What a difference. The boy I moved up front? He bacame teacher's pet (he's my boy that can't say his r's...). The loud girl? I got right on her right away. Now, she tows the line for the most part, and is probably one of my smartest KIDS in the class, not just the smartest 4th grader. It's been a month of hard work, but the fourth graders have shaped up, and my fifth graders are still nice, and the class is feeling like one community.

And now I'm too tired to write about the things that are not going well in my teaching life. I'll write about that later. For now, let's just say that last year, Mr. Principal's first year of being a principal and his first year at our school, was exhausting. This year? It's just plain frustrating...Look for lots of venting this year, and by the year's end, my adventure as I try to get a job elsewhere. I'm hoping it might be an easy thing to do, given my science success, and hopefully I passed my Take One! course I did last year. Those will look good. Hopefully good enough to overcome any bad reference from Mr. Principal, because I have no other choice. Whew...

Sound It Out!

2011-10-01T07:02:00.000-07:00

I have a fourth grade boy who can't pronounce his r's. It's cute, really...When I first changed to a 4/5 split, and heard him speak, I sent an email to our speech teacher.

"I noticed that Bobby can't pronounce his r's," I wrote. "Do you see him for speech?"

"No," she replied. "He was evaluated before, but didn't qualify. Do you notice if his speech affects his academics? Do kids make fun of him?"

Well, I just got him, so I hadn't noticed any of those things yet. He seemed to be friendly and confident with his speech, though, so I figured he was ok.

The other day, though, the kids were working on their personal narrative essays. He brought his up to me to read. "Oh no," I thought as I read, "Another football game story..."

But here's what really jumped out at me. He used the word "welly." As in "I was welly nervous..."

Welly? Do you mean "really?" I think you do. And he did this twice. Because he is sounding out the word in his head to spell it. He doesn't pronounce his r's. So "really" to him in his head sounds like "welly." He spelled it how it sounded.

I sent a new email. "Is this an example of his mispronunciation of r's affecting his academics?"

My Crazy Schedule (Made Even Crazier...)

2011-09-10T11:42:00.000-07:00

In taking this split class, I was changing from following the fifth grade schedule to the fourth grade schedule. However, my twelve fifth graders needed to be "farmed out" to the other straight fifth grades for math. And, to make the split easier for the fifth graders to handle, they would stay with that straight fifth grade class for math, followed by a 30 minutes recess and 20 minute lunch, and then go to pe or music, all with whichever fifth grade they were with. This way they got the math instruction they needed, along with the social time with their same-age peers. I'm calling this their "Fifth Grade Block" time on my daily schedule.

Meanwhile, I will getting some fourth graders from the other classes for math instruction. This should all work like a well-oiled machine.

But yesterday, the first day we were all in our new classes, was more like A Comedy of Errors. For whatever reason, fifth grade was NOT going to teach math that day, and asked me to wait until Monday to start the Fifth Grade Block. At fist I said ok, until I realized that Ms. Lunch Lady would be ready to send the lunches of my kids to whatever fifth grade class they had been farmed out to. If my kids weren't there, it would cause lots of problems. And further, if I waited until Monday to start, my fifth graders wouldn't get that promised social time with their fifth grade peers. I knew they'd be very unhappy to be in the split if they didn't get that time from day one.

So it was decided that I'd send my fifth graders as planned, and the two fifth grade classes would give all fifth graders this Degree of Reading Power test. I was a bit unhappy, as I had hoped to be able to give it to my class at once. But I am flexible. I would just give this test to my fourth graders in the afternoon, and the fifth graders would just have to work quietly or read. They could do it as they were good kids.

Meanwhile, I began my first science lesson of the year (I am teaching science as planned, as I have half a class to get to pass the science state test this year). We set up our Science Notebooks with a title page and a Table of Contents. As we were working on this, a newly-hired woman enters my room, carrying a stack of DRP test booklets. "Here you go," she said.

"Oh," I replied. "I didn't think I'd get these until the afternoon."

But she said no, that I was to give the test ASAP. "Well," I continued, "I already worked it out with fifth grade that I'd be sending my fifth grade students over and they'd take the test in their fifth grade room."

Well, she told me that whatever kids went to Ms. New Fifth Grade Teacher would have to bring their booklets with them, as there weren't enough. Ok, I can do that. Therefore, at the designated time (I thought), I passed out bubble sheets to my fifth graders, including test booklets for those that needed them, and sent them on their way. Meanwhile, I passed out bubble sheets and test booklets to my reamaining fourth graders. I assumed that the fourth graders had never taken a test like this (although some said they had), and was actually glad to have a small group to really explain how to do the test to.

I was in the middle of giving the test directions, and having the students answer the sample questions, when my door opens. In walk all seven of the fifth graders I had sent to Ms. New Teacher. "Why are you back," I asked. Well, apparently Ms. New Teacher didn't have any test booklets, so she sent my kids back. "But," I said, "you have to be in her class for lunch and recess, or I don't get my thirty minute lunch break or my planning time..." But given this wasn't the kids' fault, I just had them sit down to take the test with us. We started again.

The door opens again. In walks Ms. Education Assisstant along with Ms. Test Helper. "You can't give the test right now!" they tell me. "Ms. New Teacher doesn't have any booklets for her class."

"I know," I said, "as that is why she sent my fifth graders back. But she can't do that. She has to keep my fifth graders for the Fifth Grade Block Time." I gesture to my schedule. "I can't follow both the fifth grade schedule and the fourth grade schedule, or I won't get my thirty minute lunch or my 35 minute planning block."

Ms. Education Assisstant looked at me and said, "Well, you'll just have to figure that out!"

"When?" I asked. "It was figured out. My fifth graders were to go to their Fifth Grade Block as planned and take the DRP. Then they'd stay for recess and lunch and specialist time as planned. They were looking forward to being with their fifth grade peers. Now I have no lunch or planning. So how am I to fix it?" I was trying to remain pleasant, as 19 pairs of eyes were upon us.

Finally, Ms. Education Assisstant understood my predictament. I have learned that every position has its stresses, and no one ever understands how hard someone else's job is...But she finally understood my point. "Ok," she said. "What time do you need your fifth graders to leave?"

"I need them to leave at 11:20. That is when the fourth graders go out for recess. Then the fifth graders need to be in their farmed out classes for lunch, as that's where their lunches will be waiting. They need to stay there until 1:35, as was planned already."

"Ok. Send your seven fifth graders back to Ms. New Teacher at 11:20. Have them bring a book that they can read quietly, since the other fifth graders will be taking the DRP test. Where are your other fifth graders?" Ms. Education Assistant asked.

"They are still with Ms. Other Fifth Grade Teacher. She must have had enough test booklets, and is testing my kids, too, which was what we originally planned."

Ms. Edcation Assisstant looked at my posted schedule. "So we can get the test booklets back to you this afternoon. You can test your kids then. The kids who have already finished the test with Ms. Other Fifth Grade Teacher can just read quietly." Satisfied with herself, and for a problem solved, she took all of my test booklets and left.

For a minute we all just looked at each other. "That was absolutely crazy," I said. "That was indeed a comedy of errors." The students all agreed, eventhough they have no idea what a comedy of errors means. "How about if I just read aloud for awhile?" I ask.

My class thought that that was a splendid idea. Later that day we took the test.

I Can Tell in the First Five Minutes!

2011-09-10T11:34:00.000-07:00

So, this week the fourth grade teachers and fifth grade teachers at our building met on Tuesday after school to do the divvying up of students. Also present was Mr. Principal and Ms. Special Education Teacher. The gal who was going to be changing from a straight fourth to a straight fifth grade class is young, about 24 years old. Which means I started to teach the year she was born.

Anyway, she was listing off the kids she would be giving to me (the three fourth grade teachers had gotten together the day before ON LABOR DAY to figure this out...Who meets on weekend/vacation days to do stuff like this? Not me...). She gets to Bobby. "You will really have to stay on top of Bobby. I did the first two days of school, and today he was great!"

Thanks for your advice, Sweetie! It's cute that you think you need to tell me this. But let me tell you: I can spot who I need to "stay on top of..." within the first five minutes of meeting them!

What A Week...

2011-09-10T11:17:00.000-07:00

My head is still spinning, actually. Now, back in the summer, right before school, my teaching partner told me that Mr. Principal had told her that the two fifth grade classes would have 30 and 31 students. This is not the news you want to hear. That is a huge number, and if that was the the number they were predicting before school even began, what about those kids who get enrolled at the last minute? Or those kids that move into the school boundaries the first month? At 31, there is no room to accomodate growth...

But fourth grade was sitting pretty with 21 kids in each of the three classes. That means I had ten more kids than fourth grade in my class, and my teaching partner, who got to 32 by the first day, had eleven more students. Obviously, this wouldn't work, because, thank god, our class sizes couldn't get above 32, and at 30 we got extra para time which meant extra dollars for the school/district. They don't want to pay that extra money. The only answer was to create a split class of fourth and fifth graders.

And who was the best person to teach this split? Well, I guess that was me. Because I was the only one who had taught both fourth and fifth grade. Thus ensued many afterschool meetings as we hashed out the logistics of this switch. I was to give up 19 of my students, and keep 12 fifth graders. My teaching partner was to give up 6 of her students, bringing her down to 26 fifth graders. One of the fourth grade teachers, a newly hired gal who had only taught one year, and that was sixth grade, gave me 12 fourth graders. The rest of her fourth grade kids were doled out among the remaining two fourth grade teachers, bringing their numbers up to 25. This newest gal got my 19 kids and my partner's 6. She got a whole new class, and was now a straight fifth grade.

On Wednesday, we told the kids about the change that would happen. On Thursday, at the end of the day, we did the big switch. On Friday, we began with our new classes.

My class of 24 is not as well-behaved, actually, as my class of 31...Hopefully I'll be able to whip those fourth graders into shape. I got one girl who is the cousin of a sixth grader I had a few years ago, a class I didn't like at all. In fact, her cousin was one of my "mean girls," and that was a split class. I was not going to take another split willingly until someone else did. I took this split, as I thought since it was fourth and fifth graders, it would be better. We'll see.
The twelve fifth graders I kept are good kids. So I'm hopeful that they'll be good influences on the fourth graders. And the worst fourth grader I have is pulled out often during the day, so I won't have to deal with him too much.

But what a week.

True Quote (What Do We Do During Reading, Then?)

2011-09-03T14:14:00.000-07:00

At my two days of inservice before school was to start, us teachers were actually told "...but the students won't be allowed to read during core reading instruction..." Ah. So, I suppose they can't do math during core math instuction? And of course, they shouldn't write during core writing instruction...Genius!

The Truth Hurts

2011-09-01T19:07:00.000-07:00

Today was the first day of school. I had noticed a name on my list that sounded familiar...I thought perhaps I had a sibling or cousin of the person on my list. So this morning, as kids were working on the various sheets on their desks, I walked around the room. I got to the boy whose last name I thought I recognized...

Me: Did I have a brother or sister of yours? Or maybe a cousin?
Boy: You had my brother, Andrew.
Me (jokingly): Did he say, "Oh, too bad you have Mrs. Teacher! I hated her!"
Boy nods seriously.
Me: Really? He really said that?
Boy nods again.

The truth hurts.

Making A Difference

2011-08-31T06:16:00.000-07:00

Yesterday the results from state testing last spring were released on the superintendent of education's website. This, of course, is a big deal. You can see how the state did on an average at each grade level for each test. You can see how every district in our state did on average at each grade level for each test. Then you can also see how every single school performed at each grade level on each test.

Two years ago, I taught 5th grade with two other gals. In fifth grade the students take a state test in math, reading, and science. I always think reading and math are fairly straight forward, but science is just a hard test to prepare students for. The bulk of the test focuses on the scientific process, so that's what I spend most of my year on with my students. Then that spring they took the test. That fall, I saw the results. 35% of my kids passed the science test. I was surprised it was so low, but the state average was 34%, so I was pleased to have done better than the state average. However, my two teammates each only had one student pass the science test. Only one in each class. Therefore, our school's average was only 14.5%. What an embarrassment.

Last year, I had a different teammate who is very focused and intentional, and does a great job teaching science. We worked hard all year with our students. They took the state tests in the spring. Yesterday, we sat together in our school gym at our second day of preinservice training, waiting with baited breath for the state results to be posted online. The results were supposed to be up at 10 am, and we kept refreshing the page, waiting for them, while our assisstant principal talked about kid behavior expectations. Finally, the were posted.

We first saw the state averages. 5th grade science? 55%! Wow. That's high, we told each other with sinking hearts. We then clicked onto our district. 5th grade science? 44%. Lower, of course, than the state average but much higher than last year. Slowly, we clicked on our school and held our breath. 5th grade science? 71.9%! We stood up, right then and there in the gym, and cheered! Everyone thought we were just very excited about our new lining up policy...But we yelled out the good news! Everyone clapped and cheered, and we hugged each other and cried! We went from 14.5% last year to 71.9%! Then my teaching partner checked out every elementary school in our district, and we had the highest science score of the whole district! We beat out schools that have the gifted program, and schools that are very low free and reduced who usually get the best scores.

I tell you, I am still walking on a cloud. I could not even take in anything else that happened that day. We are the shining stars of our school, because for the third year now we have not met AYP (Adequate Yearly Progress) and so just recently we had to send a letter home to all families in our community saying we were a failing school (all becuase of Bush's No Child Left Behind Act, which Obama hasn't had the balls to change). But we are not a failing school (in fact, the only area we didn't improve on was with special ed math, which is another whole story). Now, I expect our office to get this news up on our reader board. A failing school doesn't outperform every other school in the district on a science test. We also outperformed two schools that have been continually thrown up in our faces the past two days: one is the school where our principal came from, and the other school is a high-needs school in a neighboring district that has made tremendous gains with their students. We, my partner and I, outscored them.

Another school we outperformed, much to my happiness, was my former school in a wealthy district. I was especially happy about this. This district has their own curriculum and it's all online. A few years ago I tried to get hired back into my former district, so a friend at my former school had me over to view the curriculum. At that time, I wanted to to move up to middle school, so that's what I focused on. A job never happened. I stayed at my school, moving to the 5th grade. I sent my pal an email, asking to see the 5th grade science unit on inquiry. She didn't reply to my email. I sent a reminder. Still no reply. Finally, I sent an email stating hey, if you can't send it don't worry, etc. Her reply was what made me feel hurt and angry. Basically, it said she started to copy things off for me, but then decided that she shouldn't since I wasn't in her district anymore...I wasn't one of them anymore.

I was pissed, replied that that was unfortunate in that no one creates anything new anymore anyway, they just put it together in new ways...Then I stopped contacting her. But this year? We even beat their scores! And my former school is maybe 20% free and reduced lunch. It's a well-to-do area. My current school? It's 51% free and reduced lunch! It's a high-needs school! And we outperformed so many people! I am bursting with pride for myself, my teammate, and all of my students who passed that test. I know it was a hard one; the science test is hard to prepare for and hard to take. But they did well. For the first time, I just truly feel like I've made a difference!

Something To Look Forward To

2011-08-20T22:37:00.000-07:00

School starts September 1st. Just checked Skyward and I have 31 students on my class list. One boy is autistic. I predict lots of good stories this year...

Outta There!

2011-07-08T08:37:00.000-07:00

Ding, Dong! The witch is dead. Not really dead, but Mrs. School Psychologist, whom no one liked, is no longer at our school. I would have loved to be a fly on the wall when this news was given to her. What did Mr. Principal say, I wonder? Did he tell her that no one likes her? That she's horrible at communicating and relating to others? From the union side, I wonder what went down. Had I liked her, I would have been asking her these questions to see if her rights had been violated. But I don't like her, and she didn't like me. So there you go. She's gone.

Difficult Parent (But I'm On A Break...)

2011-06-24T23:26:00.000-07:00

My family is watching a movie that I have no interest in, so I decided to check my school email in case one of my students sent me an email. Instead, I find an email from a parent, sent late afternoon on the last day of school. Here it is:

I'm wondering if you could please clarify a couple of scores on Bobby's report card. I was very shocked to see a "1" in reading and a "2" in math on his report card. I have seen him fill out his reading logs each month and made sure he brought them to school. I do know he was not great about turning in his Paws for Reading logs, but I thought that was a school incentive project and not an actual grade requirement. I also am stunned he received a 2 in math. Math is Bobby's strongest subject and do not understand how he can be performing below standard in this area. I understand you may not feel Bobby is not performing to his full potential but when comparing him to all the students in 5th grade, I find it very difficult to understand how he can be below standard.

Bobby has received some of his lowest scores on his report card this year. We take education very seriously and would have appreciated some notification if Bobby was falling below standard, especially since he has not been known to perform at that level. At our last conference, I was under the impression, Bobby's areas of improvement needed to be in organizational skills and writing, I don't recall any mention about reading or math.

I will be at the school tomorrow meeting with Mr. Principal @ 11:30. Would you be able to take a minute to help explain his report card to me?

So, threatened by the meeting with Mr. Principal? No, not at all. And to Mr. Principal's benefit, I heard nothing about this. Bobby is perfect in the eyes of his parents, but he's actually a little odd, and so are his parents. I've really had my fill of Bobby and his mom. She began the year as a room parent who helped every other week. But all of a sudden during the year she stopped helping. I think she stopped liking me. And she believes her son is brilliant, but actually he's pretty average. Everytime he had to work with someone he didn't like, he complained to his mom, who then complained to me. And when I had the kids write a five paragraph essay about what they liked about our school, his first reason was that he liked to cut paper. He apparently would sit in the back of the room and cut paper. Weird.

Anyway, I figured that even though I'm on summer break, I'd better reply. As a parent, I guess I would have wanted the teacher to reply...

Thanks for your email. I pulled up Bobby's report card to refresh my memory. In reading, the 1 I gave him was in the category for setting goals. As I stated in the comment section, Bobby only turned in one of the three reading logs (Not PAWS) for that grading term, and the reading logs are what I used for a grade for that one specific area. In math, the 2 was in "numbers," which is fractions. When Bobby took the end of the year standards based math test, he wasn't working up to standard with adding and subtracting fractions with unlike denominators. I believe he missed the subtraction of fractions with unlike denominators, and I don't recall if he struggled with adding fractions with unlike denominators as well. A 3 means he is at standard, and he wasn't showing that he was there yet. That is why in the comments I said he needed to practice that skill. I remember also being a bit surprised that he missed a fair number of the word problems, and several of those word problems involved fractions. The test showed that he was not yet proficient with fractions.

I agree that he is strongest in math, and math was harder this third term with fractions and division. I think he just needs more practice, and that will help him! I do make sure kids take home math tests for parent signatures so that parents can see immediately where their kids are having difficulty. Take a look at the one math test that covers everything...Any area that has a score of a two out of four is an area that he can practice with this summer. I hope this helps.

I am so glad to be done with that family. I'm sure she won't want the younger girl to have me now. That's fine with me!

Too Over the Top?

2011-06-22T10:41:00.000-07:00

I teach with a very organized lady. I'm reminded of when I first started teaching at the age of 25. I was taken under the wing of another teacher who was the age of my mom, and she was very organized. It was good for me. I learned how to be organized. But I inspired her with ideas. So we worked well together. I'd come up with "Why don't we..." ideas, and she'd organize them. Now, I'm in the same type of teaching situation. I have the vast years of experience and ideas now to draw from, and my teammate, who is my age but has only been teaching for five years, is totally organized. We benefit from each others' strengths.

But Mrs. Organized Teacher needs to relax. That's the effect I had hoped to have on her this year. My hope was that she'd learn to go with the flow a little bit. Here are some examples of being a little too organized:

*It was the first day for the 5th grade to take the state test. When I got to school and headed to my classroom, I saw that Mrs. Intervention Specialist was talking with Mrs. Organized Teacher in her room. I walked in.

It was a heated discussion about the schedule of the day. Mrs. Intervention Specialist was handing out the school-wide testing schedule for the day, and Mrs. Organized Teacher was very upset with it. The Powers That Be had decided that, since some kids would be testing with different teachers other than their homeroom teacher, depending on their learning needs, everyone should take breaks at the same time. During those break times, teachers were to email updates from their respective rooms, giving an update as to how many kids were finished, how many were still testing, etc.

Well, Mrs. Organized Teacher was very unhappy to not be in control of her break time. "But the Teacher's Testing Manual says the students should have a break after 45 minutes of testing-not an hour! My kids can't go for an hour straight without a break..." Mrs. Intervention Specialist was trying, I could tell, to remain calm. Was Mrs. Organized Teacher overreacting? Yes, I beleive she was. I caught Mrs. Intervention Specialist's eye, and said, "Could you come in to my room when you are finished here?"

I went into my room. Soon, Mrs. Intervention Specialist came in..."Oh My F*%#ing God," she exclaimed.

"Did you see her schedule on the board?" I asked. "She practically has written down when the kids should breathe..."

*On the last full day of school, I had planned a fun day. We were going to start the day with a movie. I always show "Akeelah and the Bee." It's a good inspirational movie. Then, I had made plans for a pizza party and had been collecting money from the kids to help pay for it. Finally, we were to have Field Day in the afternoon. I figured if I had any extra time, I'd fill it by showing Meerkat Manor episodes.

That morning, Mrs. Organized Teacher came into my room. "What will you do today if you have any extra time?" she asked. I told her I was just going to show Meerkat Manor episodes, and asked her if she wanted to borrow any DVDs (I have the first three seasons). She said no, that she would do this thing or maybe the other...Then she asked me again what I was doing that day. I told her we'd start with the movie, then have the pizza party, and then Field Day in the afternoon.

"How will you get your lunch," she asked. I said I was going to eat pizza with the kids. "But how will you get your half hour break with all that?" she continued. "Unless you maybe had your lunch delivered later...Let's see. I know! You could ask Ms. Lunch Lady to deliver your lunch at 12:25, after the 30 minute recess. Then you could get your break, then have lunch, and then do Field Day. Or, wait a minute...How about if you..."

At this point I just laughed and patted her shoulder, before she had a coronary attack. "Mrs. Organized Teacher," I said, "It will all work out. We will just go with the flow. I don't want you in a panic as you try to plan my day..."

*On the last day of school, Mrs. Organized Teacher was worried (once again) about having too much down time. After our end of the year assembly, we still would have about 1.5 hours to fill. She was worried. She talked to me after school the day before, saying she thought that she'd take her class out to play kickball for about 45 minutes after the assembly. That seemed like a good idea, so I suggested we take both classes out. She liked that idea, but of course, questions arose. Do we play my class against her class? Do we mix the kids?

We decided that since they'd be mixed in 6th grade, we should mix them up now. I said, since my students had numbers, that I'd split my class in half. Oddly enough, her class wasn't numbered (you mean I was more organized??), but she'd also get them split into two groups.

Then came the morning of the last day. She had it all organized, of course. She'd sent out the emails to staff letting all know that we'd be using the back baseball diamond for our game. She had gone to the pe teacher for cones and balls. She's set.

Mrs. Organized Teacher came into my room in the morning. "OK," she said. "So, do you want to put the kids into Group One and Group Two, or we could do Group A and Group B, or may Blue Group and White Group?"

I just had to laugh.

Don't Judge A Book...

2011-06-20T21:39:00.000-07:00

This evening I went to the mall to get my hair done (I really feel that, on the last day of school, I shouldn't be grey. I don't want the kids to remember me that way...). Anyway, I parked, and headed towards the mall. I stopped at the crosswalk. I waited for cars to stop so I could cross. I waited. And I waited. All of these average looking, middle-aged drivers in big cars who were in so much of a hurry that they couldn't stop to let someone cross EVENTHOUGH I WAS WAITING AT THE CROSSWALK!

As I was waiting, I heard the deep "boom, boom" of someone's car stereo, some rap music cranked up to full volume and rattling the windows. As this car approached, full of laughing, no-care-in-the-world teenagers, I totally expected them to even laugh at me as they revved through the crosswalk.

But I was wrong. They slowed down and stopped. And waited for me to cross. I gave a polite, somewhat sheepish wave as I crossed.

Those kids stopped when others, who seemed more aware of just the social norms, didn't. It just goes to show. Don't judge a book by it's cover.

Just Follow My Directions Next Time

2011-06-16T20:13:00.000-07:00

This morning I had a training on Autism at school from 8:30-11:00. The original plan had been that the teachers attending the training would get a half-day sub so that we could do the training, discuss together afterwards, and have time for lunch. But apparently our office manager forgot to put in for the subs. Yet the trainer was still coming, so the office had to scramble around, finding any available certified person to help cover classes. This included our principal and education assisstant.

Now, school ends next Tuesday. We aren't doing a whole lot in class. Kids are working on their "ABCs of Fifth Grade Memories" book, and they are also having fun doing Chinese paper cuts. These two things keep them busy. I also thought that a good activity students could do with the sub was to write letters to next year's fifth graders, telling them what they could look forward to in my class.

I got to school today to find out that both my principal and my education assisstant would be covering my class (the fact that it took two of them to fill my shoes did not go by unnoticed). So I explained to my principal that I had typed up a list of activities that the kids were to work on in the order that they were listed, and that it was already on the document camera, all set up. I knew my kids would be fine. I was happy, actually, to have the head honchos in my class.

So, I sit through my training. There are four labeled autistic kids in third grade, moving to fourth, then fifth, etc. Third grade was exhausted this year. This training was to give us more information and tools to cope. But we've had lectures on autism all ready; what we needed was for people to tell us how to deal with these kids in a room where we have 24-28 other students. The stiff presentation quickly turned to a more informal question and answer format which was more useful. Still, it was apparent to me that the district needs to step up more and provide support. But, it was an ok training.

I returned to my classroom. Mrs. Education Assisstant was in my room. Kids were glad to see, but they had obviously been having a wonderful time with Mrs. Education Assisstant. She looked almost disappointed that her time with my class was done. She told me that she was like the grandparent who comes in and just has fun, and then leaves. Then she said to the kids, "Let's tell Mrs. Teacher what we did with the letters!" Excited murmers break out amongst the kids as she proceeds to tell me that they decided to pretend that there is a secret to being in my classroom, and that if the kids only know the password, they can take part in all kinds of fabulous adventures, like our own swimming pool, trips to China and Australia, a candy store, and more. Kids were so excited! Yes they were! And it totally was not what I wanted them to do!

I'm sorry! I wanted them to write, "Dear Fifth Grade Student, You are so lucky to have Mrs. Teacher for fifth grade this year! We did so many great things, like Chinese papercuts, lots of science projects, and we made our own calendar each month..."

Boring, I know. But that's what I wanted. The truth. A letter that I can lay on each desk in the fall, so that when my new student comes in and finds his or her desk, there is something to do right away. Something that hopefully lets the new student know that it will be a good year. Not make believe. The truth.

Now, I have to do the whole thing again tomorrow. Because Grandma went home, and now Mom is back.

Surprisingly Open Minded

2011-06-14T21:15:00.000-07:00

I went to my daughter's choir concert tonight. She goes to the junior high school in our small, and somewhat conservative, community. So I was surprised and delighted by what I saw up on the wall. But no one else seemed to think it was interesting but me...

They are currently having "Spirit Week" at the school. There were banners up in the room where the concert was held, informing one of what events were happening each day. Each day, the banners said, the students and staff should dress in a particular color. Monday was red day that stood for having the courage to be kind (I didn't know that took courage, but there you go...). Today, Tuesday, you were to dress in yellow, because it was a "smiley" color, according to the banner. Wednesday is green day for "Give Compliments." Thursday you were to dress in blue and gold, the school colors.

Then there was Friday. I just laughed to myself as I looked at the banner. The banner urged the students to dress in "any color" that day. I thought that was funny for two reasons.

1. It's unavoidable. It would be the same as if the banner said that on Friday you should wear clothes. Of course kids will dress in any color. Because they will be dressed. And clothing typically comes in colors. So regardless of whether they are participating in Spirit Week or not, they will be wearing colors, so I guess they will be participating. It's a win either way for the ASB.

2. The poster itself was painted in rainbow colors. It urged the students to wear any colors they wanted to wear. The banner said that students should "respect the diversity of others." Now, this was refreshing. The school is celebrating Gay Pride Day! That is very open-minded for this community. The junior high did something without fanfare that even the Space Needle could not do: Celebrate and support diversity! I have a new respect for my little community.

But no one seemed to find the humor in it as I did.

A Good Role Model

2011-06-13T21:45:00.000-07:00

Today my husband forwarded an email he got from my younger daughter's homeroom teacher. It was an email sent out to the families of all of her students, informing them that the students would be shown the movie "Stand and Deliver," with a warning that it had language that might not be appropriate for 7th graders.

His accompanying message: I figure she might as well watch it. She won't hear anything she hasn't all ready heard at home from her mom...

Not A Compliment

2011-06-08T19:35:00.000-07:00

Right now in writing I'm having my kids write poetry. I find different styles of poetry, or sometimes find a poem and have the students write their own version of the poem. It's a great thing to do at the end of the year, because there is no "beginning" or "ending" to the unit-we'll just write poems until time runs out. Poems are also a great way to get kids to work on word choice and desciptive writing in a less-formal structure, unlike an essay, say.

So the other day the students wrote "Feeling" poems. Bobby, who is a very smart boy, wrote a poem about the feeling of "boredom." He began his poem, "Boredom is dull grey..." and went on to describe boring things, like taking the state test. It was actually pretty clever. Of course, this kid drives me nuts, and he is the biggest pain in my side this year. And he's never sick. Never. My best two days of the year were when he was on suspension.

But he wrote this poem about boredom. Now, Bobby is capable of great things, but doesn't try at all. When I have my kids write poems, their homework is to type up the poem, print it off, and give it a colorful border by hand. If they don't have a printer, they can email it to me and I'll print it off at school. Bobby did the later.

I printed off the poem, and put it on his desk before school. Later, the poem showed up in the Homework Basket. The border was just a thick, lightly-colored border colored carelessly with a light-colored pencil. The border barely showed up. It was truly a boring border.

I went over to Bobby. "Bobby," I said. "This was a fabulous idea! Your poem was about boredom, and this is the most boring border I have ever seen! That was so clever of you! I would never have thought of this. Congratulations."

He looked confused. Was this in fact a compliment? I don't think he was quite sure...

Rebuttal (From Ms. Psych)

2011-06-06T21:33:00.000-07:00

The fun continues, but now I will stop:

In response to your latest email, regarding my choice of working in schools is none of your business. My career and employment are my business. Your behavior has become most unbelievable and childish. It is obvious that you are taking the focus off yourself and now attacking me, because I brought it to your attention that you spoke loudly in the library in front of my office and led your students to do the same. Most teachers are very considerate of the other people working, as they help their students line up in front of my office. I followed the “Code of Conduct” that was developed at our school, by addressing this problem with you. Instead, your response was deflection of the problem and attacking my career.

Might your loudness be retaliatory because I would not fold to your pushiness to get my signature on the voluntary union dues? Prior to the library incident, you came to my office twice, within a two week period, to get me to sign up for the voluntary dues for lobbying, which were to be taken out of my monthly check. The first time, I told you that I was not interested because I already have enough dues taken out. Percentage wise, because I am at the top of the pay scale, I have more dues taken out than the average teacher. The second time, when you threw the form on my desk, my name filled out in your handwriting was feeling a bit like strong-arming me into signing. I said, “no” the first time and “no” will always mean “no”. What do you think the union would say if they knew one of their union representatives is behaving in this manner? Don’t confuse responsibility with a false sense of power. It’s time for you to step down from your role as a union rep. Please do not contact me again on this matter unless it is with an apology. In doing so, I will consider it further harassment. Please take me off your email lists for union communication and do not email me at home.

Hey, she's free to run against me. No one does. I'm good at it. And people like me...Of course, today I did have fun walking past her office and saying in a loud voice, "Good morning, Mrs. Librarian!" Childish? Damn right! That's what's fun. Gotta keep a bit of the child alive in you. But there will be no apology. And I think she'll be gone next year anyway, as I don't think anyone gets along with her.

Response

2011-06-06T20:16:00.001-07:00

Dear Ms. Psychologist,
If you don't want to hear children in the library, then you shouldn't work at a school.
Me

"Library Ettiquette," Apparently

2011-06-01T20:28:00.000-07:00

Today was our last official visit to our school's library to check out books. Next week the kids just get to go to hear a presentation from the city's public library about the summer reading program. We are winding down.

So today was our last official visit as a class. Our librarian greets my students every week with a "Good morning/afternoon," which my class responds to in unison, "Good morning/afternoon, Mrs. Librarian!" Every week it is the same. So some years ago, maybe three years ago, I began to have my students thank the librarian in unison when we lined up at the door to leave. We line up, and I say, "Ok, class...What do you say to Mrs. Librarian?" And the class says, "Thank you, Mrs. Librarian!" I usually then comment about how polite and cute the students are, and then we head back to class. Like I say, I've been doing this for about three years now. I figure that many of my students aren't taught to say please and thank you, so I'm teaching some manners and respect by doing this. Plus, it's fun.

Today was no different. As we lined up at the door to leave, I said, "OK, class...What do you say to Mrs. Librarian?" And they all responded in unison, "Thank you, Mrs. Librarian!" I reminded the students and our librarian that this was the last time they would say this to her as 5th graders.

We got back to class and got busy with some math, and then began social studies. It was a while before I got back to my lap top. I had a message in my email box from Ms. Psychologist. The subject line read: Library Ettiquette." I began to read, and my jaw dropped.

Please remember that when you are in the library that people are working. I would appreciate it if you would keep this in mind the next time you are visiting the library. When you guided your students in front of my office to shout out, “Thank Mrs. Librarian”, interferes when I am trying to write reports and have them ready for meetings. Thank you for your understanding.

Yes, her office is RIGHT THERE where we line up. Usually her door is closed. My school is old and small. There aren't lots of office spaces. But our Education Assisstant is there as well, and she wasn't bothered. Plus, I really take offense at the fact that she says I "guided" my students to "shout out" thank you. I prompt them. And we never shout. Ask anyone. Ask Mrs. Librarian. Or as Mrs. Education Assistant. They both will confirm that never have I asked the kids to shout.

So I was majorly ticked off. I replied back to her, but cc'd both the EA and the librarian. I said I never have the kids shout. And they are always well behaved in the library. She replied back again that I told them to shout. I wanted to just reply, " F#$% Y*$, B$#@&."

But I didn't. I did, however, include Mr. Principal in the the email trail. I said I never have my kids shout, and all I'm doing is teaching a little bit of manners, that maybe is something not all the kids are taught. I said I have been doing this for years now, and I have no intention of stopping. And I won't. Let her try to make an issue of it. It takes all of what---5 minutes to do this? After all, this is an elementary school, so I think she should expect noise from classes every once in awhile.

Grrr. I hope she comes to me with a union problem soon. She'll find out I'm not so eager to help her.

Too Much Information

2011-05-25T18:21:00.000-07:00

Today while my class was working in pairs and small groups with the lap tops during social studies, I saw Bobby get up and sign out to the bathroom. I'm not sure why I noticed, except that when he tossed the pass (a cd) onto his desk, it fell, so he had to walk over to pick it up. Then he left the class.

I was making the rounds of the student pairs and small groups. I kept noticing that Cindy, who had been working with Bobby (against her will), was all alone (and happy about that, I'm sure...). I glanced at the clock, noting the time, and went over to the bathroom sign-out sheet. When kids sign out to the bathroom, they write down their name and the time. When they come back in, they again write down the time. That way I can tell if a kid is wasting time. I figure it should only take them about 5 minutes. When I looked at Bobby's sign-out time, I could see that it had already been 11 minutes. So I waited.

Soon Bobby came back and rejoined his partner (much to her dismay). I strolled over and grabbed the bathroom sign-out sheet. According to Bobby's sign-in time, he had been in the bathroom for 14 minutes. I called Bobby over.

"Bobby, how long were you in the bathroom?" I asked.

He looked at the clock. "I think for 15 minutes..." he said.

Without thinking, I said, "What were you doing for 15 minutes?" Then I caught myself. "Never mind," I said. "It should only take you about 5 or 6 minutes to go to the bathroom, wash your hands, and get back to class. You owe me time. You will do 10 minutes on a paw at recess."

Later I wrote out the recess slip and handed it to Bobby. He took it from me. Then he said, "I couldn't help it. It was a big one..."

Too much information.

Birds and the Bees

2011-05-21T18:42:00.000-07:00

Today I took my class on a field trip to a small local zoo. Very small. The only animals they had there were all kinds of exotic birds (but only one each), several Asian cranes, lemurs, alpacas, mule deer, reindeer, 4 Siberian tigers...and I think that was it. But, our school was registered with them, so we got an hour long guided tour, and the sun was out, so we really had a great time. Not one complaint.

Anyway, during the guided tour, we were at the exhibit of the Asian cranes. The guide was explaining the characteristics of the bird, including the fact that there were both male and female birds in the exhibit. As we watched, one of the cranes began this display thing, spreading his wings out wide and just running from one end of the exhibit to the other. All of us adults knew what the crane wanted.

Several of the parents were next to me. "You know," I said, "If we watch much longer, I won't have to teach health this year..."

It's All In The Delivery Pt. 2

2011-05-06T16:20:00.000-07:00

She tried again another day.

Susan: Knock,knock.
Me: Who's there?
Susan: Apple.
Me: Apple who?
Susan: Knock,knock.
Me: Who's there?
Susan: Apple.
Me: Apple who?
Susan: Knock,knock.
Me: Who's there?
Susan: Apple.
Me: Apple who?
Susan: Knock, knock.
Me: Who's there?
Susan: Orange.
Me: Orange who?
Susan: Orange you glad I didn't say Banana?...Oh, man...!

It's All In The Delivery...

2011-05-06T16:04:00.000-07:00

Susan wanted to tell me a joke the other day:

Susan: Knock,knock.
Me: Who's there?
Susan: Orange.
Me: Orange who?
Susan: Knock,knock.
Me: Who's there?
Susan: Orange.
Me: Orange who?
Susan: Knock,knock.
Me: Who's there?
Susan: Bananna.
Me: Bananna who:
Susan: Aren't you glad I didn't say...Oh, shoot!

You Had Me At 'And'...

2011-05-05T20:52:00.000-07:00

The other day I took my students to library. It's just a quick 15 minute time to check out books, and then we leave. Anyway, after the first 10 minutes, most all of the kids had checked out books and were sitting quietly at tables reading. Just a few students were still wandering along the bookshelves, searching...

I went over to Johnny, who was one of the wanderers. "Johnny, have you found a book yet?" I asked. Johnny was holding one book all ready.

"I'm looking for a certain book," Johnny replied. "It's by something-Jack. Or London somebody...I'm not sure..." He turned back to the nearby computer to check. "It's by London Jack," he verified.

I looked at the screen, and saw that he was looking for a book by Jack London. I pointed out that the last name is first, and then we walked to the "L" section. We located the few books by Jack London.

You need to understand that Johnny has the reading level of a third grader on a good day. All of Jack London's books are at an 8th grade level. But Johnny likes books about dogs. He pulled out a copy of White Fang. "How about this book," he asked.

"Well," I answered. "It's a very good book. It'll be challenging for you, but it's very good." He decided that he would give it a try, and took it to the check out counter. I wandered around a bit checking on the rest of the kids, then headed toward to check out counter in time to hear the librarian also tell Johnny that the book would be a challenge. "But he likes books about dogs," I said, "so that interest might do the trick!" She checked out the book to Johnny. He went to the nearest table and sat. Soon he calls out, "Mrs. Teacher, you were right!" I walked over to him. He is pointing about halfway down the first paragraph of the book.

"It is a good book! And I'm only up to 'and'!" He was so proud.

Spell Checker

2011-04-28T08:12:00.000-07:00

Yesterday I was working with my students, preparing for our state assessment in reading next week. We were reviewing a practice reading packet, and I had typed up student responses that had gotten different scores. This is always good for the kids to see what is a full-point answer, what is a partial point answer, and what is a 0-point answer. I had typed up the student answers earlier this week.

I had just put up on the document camera a response for the class to read. Before I could get to it, an assisstant came into the room to pull some kids. There was a bit of commotion as I talked a bit with the assisstant, and as we were talking, I hear giggling break out in the room.

I sternly glance over at the class. "What's going on?" I asked. No one said anything, but continued to laugh. Something had happened.

I warned them to be quiet while I dealt with the assisstant, but they continued to laugh. I was getting angry at their behavior. I looked back up, and told them that I was taking minutes off their recess for this rude behavior. The assisstant then left, taking a few students with her to work with. I turned my attention back to the student response that was up on the Smartboard in front of the class, bigger than life, and began to read the response.

It was a response to a little story about a girl who was going to go to summer camp. She was excited and had just received the information packet with a list of all the activities. I began to read the student response aloud: "...she was excited to do all of the activities like swimming and arts and craps..."

The class burst out laughing. "Oh," I said. "This is what you were laughing about!" They nodded. "Well," I continued, "that is pretty funny!" I took back my minutes off recess. I'm not unreasonable.

April Fools!

2011-04-01T23:02:00.000-07:00

I played an April Fool's Day joke on my class. I don't usually do this, but a perfect one just came to me this morning.

All this week, part of their homework was to complete paragraphs 2-4 of a five paragraph essay that we are working on. The due date all week has been Friday. But yesterday, Thursday, the kids got so involved in this little science project, that we just didn't get to writing. And since that night was the science fair, and most of my kids were coming to it, I just didn't think it would be good to assign the writing due the next day. I knew the kids would be busy. So at the end of the day Thursday I told the kids not to worry about finishing paragraphs 2-4 as homework, that we'd finish it the next day.

So this morning I decided that I'd pretend I had changed my mind and made it homework. After school started, and my kids were at music, I added it to my homework page for yesterday, as if it had been there all along. Then I also scrolled down on my homework page and wrote "April Fools!"

The kids worked all morning long on a math chapter test. Five minutes before recess, with all kids done with the test, I got up. I stood at my desk, but pretended to be looking at a check off sheet for homework. "Ok," I said. "When I call your name, answer yes if you turned in your final essay, and answer no if you didn't get it done."

There was a bit of stunned silence, and a few whispers. "Amy?" I called out. Now, Amy does all her work, and does it spectacularly. But she timidly said no. I continued to go down the list, with kids saying no...no...no. When I finally got to the last kid, and all had said no, I looked up at them.

"Don't any of you ever go to my homework page?" I asked. A few hands went up. "Well," I continued. "I decided last night to add this homework assignment. You should have checked."

I had my website showing on the smart board, and opened my homework page. "See? There it is. I made it bold so that you all would notice it." Josh raised his hand. I called on him. "But I checked the website at 9 pm," he said. "It wasn't there."

"Well, I guess I added it after 9 pm, then. You must have missed it. Let's see what else you might have missed."

I scrolled down until the words "April Fools!" appeared. The class was greatly relieved, and thought I had pulled off a great joke. They applauded me. All but Izzy. She came up to me and said, "You know, that was a mean joke. I was worried because I hadn't done the essay and turned it in."

"But Izzy," I replied. "You never turn things in. What did it matter this time?"

Well, she didn't know, but it just did!

The Hands-On Approach

2011-03-06T11:33:00.000-08:00

I have a student who has been masturbating in class. I caught him doing it once, although I tried to convince myself I was wrong. Then another teacher who works with him in a small group also caught him doing it. Geez.

This weekend I've been completing my report card for the trimester, with conferences coming up in two weeks. I got to his report card, and toyed with what kinds of comments I should leave on his report card. Here are some possibilities:

*He should foucus more, and masturbate less.

*Your child will go blind if he doesn't stop pulling his peter.

*He has mastered penis pulling. Now he needs to work on his multiplication tables.

*He needs to focus on reading without his hands in his pants.

*Child is beyond his years in sexual awareness but doesn't grasp social norms as well as he grasps his own penis.

*He has mastered his bator. Now he needs to work on his word choice.

*A hobby may help your child reach his full potential.

Out of the Mouths of Babes Pt. 3

2011-03-03T22:31:00.000-08:00

Quote from a fifth grader's essay: "Opinions are like elbows: everybody has them!"

The Magic of Childhood

2011-03-03T10:12:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was Read Across America Day, which was begun in honor of Dr. Seuss' birthday. It was more low-key this year, thankfully. Last year grade levels had to choose a specific book to read and do projects on, decorate, dress up, etc. Still, many staff members dressed up. Not me, though.

But I like the Read Across America Day as it gives me a built in excuse to have the kids read all day while I work on grading assessments for report cards. Earlier this week, I was talking to the other 5th grade teacher, who thought she'd show "Horton Hears A Who." That sounded like a great idea, so I had one student assigned to bring in the movie yesterday.

Anyway, the day began with announcements from my long-winded principal. But he was talking in an English accent, or at least his version of an English accent. I only sort of listen, as I don't have kids in my room (my planning) and I'm usually running around getting things ready for the day. But soon I realize he is actually reading a Dr. Seuss book for his announcement. Now, any Dr. Seuss book is fabulous, but they aren't short stories. It takes about 15-20 minutes to read aloud one of his books, espicially if you are taking your time to get the rhythm and rhyme down, and all in an English accent. Plus, he never told the staff he was going to do this; maybe he thought it was a nice surprise for us all, but as teachers, we just see it eating up 20 minutes of our class time...As I walked passed classrooms, I saw bored looking kids with their heads on the hands, or turned and chatting with neighbors. It's hard to listen to a story via an intercom.

Soon the day ended. I led my class out to the bus lines, and stood near the back of the day car vans line-I always help get those kids out to their vans. One little girl asked if she could walk with me, so I took her cute little hand in mine. As we walked out to the day care vans, I asked her how her day was.

"It was great!" she said. "We made Dr. Seuss hats!" Then she told me, "And he told a story this morning!" I was assuming she meant the story over the intercom this morning. I said something about being surprised that Mr. Principal did that. She furrowed her brow at that, and said, "Was that Mr. Principal, or was that the Cat in the Hat?"

I felt like a heel. I had missed the introduction; of course Mr. Principal had been pretending to be the Cat in the Hat! And even though all of the big kids in 5th and 6th grade looked bored, I bet those primary grades were full of excited kids listening to the Cat in the Hat! I have become jaded by my older students. I quickly retracted my statement...."Oh, I think you are right! I think that WAS the Cat in the Hat..."

Then I put her on her van to her day care.

This Is What Happens When One Assumes...

2011-02-11T07:06:00.000-08:00

Yesterday something happened that just threw me out of my usual "in control" feeling...

It was about 1:10 in the afternoon, in the middle of our reading time. I was reading the second part of a nonfiction picture book about the devastating fire in Yellowstone back in 1987 (I believe...). The students were listening for effects from that fire and taking notes (encouraged strongly by me...), when Mrs. Office Helper calls over the intercom. I'm pretty focused on the lesson I'm doing with my students, but part of me tunes in to her announcement. I heard the name "Pashton," and the words, "...down in the office..." Since Pashton was not with me but was in his afternoon Language class, I made the assumption that he had been sent to the office for being naughty during his other class, and the office was just alerting me. It seemed strange, since Pashton is a nice boy, and the office NEVER alerts us. I, however, continued on with my lesson.

About five minutes later I sensed an adult outside our classroom door. It opens up, and a man looks in. He glances around and then asks where Pashton is. I replied that Pashton was in the office. The man, who I then knew was Pashton's dad, said, "No, I just came from the office."

"But the office just called about five minutes ago," I responded, confused. "They said that Pashton had been sent to office."

Pashton's dad gave me an exasperated look, bordering on a look that said, "You are an idiot. My son has an idiot for a teacher..." He again reiterated that he had just come from the office and that Pashton definitely was not there. But, he sighed, he would go back to the office to find out what's happened. He closed the door and left.

I looked at my students. They said, in very patient voices, "Mrs. Teacher, the office DID say that Pashton's dad was here and that they were sending him over to the classroom."

"They did?" I asked.

"Yes," my students replied, looking at me sympathetically.

"Oh." I got up and picked up my phone. I dialed the office. Mrs. Office Helper answered. "I misunderstood your message earlier," I explained. "I thought you had said that Pashton was in the office, so I sent his dad back there."

"No," Mrs. Office Worker replied, unnecessarily. "He came to eat lunch in the classroom with Pashton today."

Now I was more confused, actually, then ever. "But we've already had lunch. It is reading time," I replied.

"When is your lunch?" she asked (even though, of course, the office has the master schedule of all recesses and lunches...). I blanked out for a second about our lunch time. This whole situation was too much, taking too much of my time. I looked at my students. "What time is our lunch?" I asked.

They replied that it is at 12:20, and further pointed out to me that it was there on my daily schedule, as it has been all year, right in front of me.

"Oh," I replied again. I told Mrs. Office Helper that our lunch was at 12:20, so I had no idea why Pashton's dad showed up to class at 1:10, expecting to eat lunch with his son. Although I have my suspicions that he was told the wrong time for lunch by someone in the office...

Anyway, as I figured out what must have happened, I sent an email to Pashton's mom, apologizing to the dad and explaining what I was assuming happened that day...And that Pashton's dad was welcome to come for lunch at 12:20 any day he wished!

But this whole incident threw me off my teaching game for the remainder of the day.

Most Popular Post

2011-01-30T12:45:00.000-08:00

I'm still not convinced anyone really reads my blog. I think they get here by accident, and leave quickly. I know someone got to my blog by putting the word "bifocals" into their search engine.

Interestingly enough, though, the one post that has had the most hits, whether it was read or not, is the post I entitled "Stalker." Are there that many people out there needing to google "stalker"?

The Obvious is Restated

2011-01-29T09:32:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I let my students get their Behavior Reward. Of course, as usual, I had fun with spelling out the reward. As they showed good behavior, I added letters on the board until I had spelled out "Broccoli and Exams." I made a big deal about it when the whole thing was spelled out: "I really know what fifth graders like, don't I? You guys are so lucky...Congratulations on earning broccoli and exams.." Or, words to that affect. But yesterday morning I wrote in the letters that spelled "Brownies and Books." When the kids came in and saw the real reward, they were so excited. I, of course, pretended that that was the reward the whole time, and why on earth would I have written broccoli and exams? What kind of silly teacher would think that THAT was a treat that fifth graders would enjoy?

So the last 40 minutes of the day they got to eat brownies, sit anywhere in the room with friends, and read (although there was more chit chat going on than reading...). Here are some funny things that happened:

*I bought three containers of small brownies-32 brownies in each container. I have 27 kids. Two were absent, and two went home early. I knew that everyone could have at least three brownies. The kids took three each. I then quickly assessed that students could have a fourth brownie if they wished. Kids took a fourth, and there were only about 11 brownies left. They were just sitting on a desk near me, but I wasn't really paying attention. I was writing plans for the sub Monday since I'll be lobbying at our state capital on Monday.

Soon, it is time to get ready to go home. I'm still not really paying attention, and am organizing things for the sub as students get ready. Then I hear, "John, is that your sixth brownie?"

I look up then to see John, a somewhat heavyset boy, heading back to his seat, chewing. "John," I said. "How many brownies have you had?"

John looks down at the ground. "Five," he said.

"And how many did I say you could have?" I inquired further.

"Four," he replied.

"And so why did you take a fifth?" I asked.

"I couldn't help myself..." he replied.

*As kids took their brownies, they looked at me. "Where are the books," they asked. I looked over at my 6-7 bookshelves that are jam-packed full of books. "Geee," I replied, looking around. "I am not sure just where in this class you will find a book. But good luck..."

I thought that was a strange thing to ask me, but maybe some kids thought that since I provided brownies that I was also going to be bringing in all new books...Sort of like Oprah: "You all get new books! You get a book, and you get a book, and you get a book..." That would have been expensive...

*Isabelle came up to me after eating her brownies. "Mrs. Teacher," she said, "This is the best Friday we've had yet this year. Do you want to know why?" I asked her why. "Because," she said, "We started the day with an assembly, then instead of reading or writing we got to do science, and then..." Isabelle told me everything we had done that day, ending with the Brownies and Books Reward.

I knew what had happened that day. I was there. I planned it all. But it was cute anyway!

What's Your Sign?

2011-01-14T07:55:00.000-08:00

What? I'm a Cancer? But I've been a Leo for 48 years. How can they do this to me? What are they doing to my sense of identity? I'm going to need years of therapy to deal with this.

Not Always a Cream Puff Job

2011-01-12T19:51:00.000-08:00

When my older daughter was in kindergarten, she had a friend who's mom didn't work. The mom used to work at Microsoft, but as she was married to a lawyer, she quit work once she had her daughter. Her only child. So, once the kid started school, she had the whole day to herself. Let's see...she took ballet lessons, and she rode her horse that she leased. I'm not quite sure what else she did to fill the days. But I do remember once telling her about my job. At that time, I was working half-time, teaching an elementary gifted program. I saw kids twice a week on Tuesdays and Thursdays, and then worked half a day Wednesday without seeing kids. She told me I had a "cream puff job." This coming from a gal who hadn't worked out of the home in 6+ years? Anyway...

The job isn't always a cream puff job, even though I usually share the humorous things. But take Jack's little episode that occured the other day. Jack has a tendency to refuse to do what an adult says. He has pulled this on me in the past, but as I didn't let him get away with it, he really doesn't pull it with me anymore. He has refused a sub's direction, a para-educator's direction, and has refused to follow directions given to him by the music and/or pe teacher.

But the other day, he refused my directions. I walked by his desk during a work time during math. Jack was just sitting there. Not doing his work. "Jack," I said, "Get to work." He just sat. I stopped. "Jack," I said again. "I gave directions for completing your math. Get to work now."

Jack did as he usually does when he gets in trouble: he hunched down and pulled his jacket over his head to hide his face. I knelt down. "Jack," I said. "You have two choices. You can sit up and do your math, or I will write you a white slip, and you can work on your math in the office." He remained hidden. "Jack," I continued, aggravation beginning to slip into my voice, "Make a decision now." Jack began to cry.

"Jack, cut out the crying. You are in 5th grade. Now sit up and do your math. I am going to help some other students, and when I come back, I want to see some completed problems in your spiral." I walked to a student a few desks down who needed some help. While I was helping her, I began to hear Jack kicking his desk. I ignored him. Then from the corner of my eye I saw a movement come from his direction. I glanced up, didn't see him, and for a moment I thought he had ran out. But no. He was now hiding under his desk. This was a new one. I had never seen him do this, but apparently he did it a lot last year.

I got down again to his level, or almost, since he was under a desk. Through gritted teeth, I growled, "Get UP!" (When I told this to my daughter, she said that's exactly how I sound when I tell them to get up in the morning. But I digress...)

He did have enough sense to get up. "Come with me," I said, and went into the hall without looking back at him. Once in the hall, I turned to him. "Don't you ever kick a desk or even think of hiding underneath a desk AGAIN! This is not kindergarten, and that is not acceptable behavior for a 5th grader! The next time you do that, if you should have the bad judgement to choose to do it, I will send you to the office quicker that you will believe!" Or it was something like that. "Now," I continued. "You will go back into the room, and do your math."

We returned to the room. Jack sat at his desk. And Jack did his math. Later at lunchtime he gave me some of his candy.

Cream puff job? Oy, vey!

Kids Are Funny!

2011-01-07T05:54:00.000-08:00

*I was going over the math homework with the kids. The lesson the day before had to do with creating a line graph. The homework had the kids take data and create their own line graph. The data provided had to do with number of kites sold at a kite store, and the data collection box was called "Kite Inventory." Together, we were creating the line graph so kids could compare it to what they had done for their homework. Finally, I asked the class, "What would be a good title for this graph? All graphs need to have a title."

Joe raised his hand. I called on Joe. He said, "Days Gone By, Kites Sail High!"

I burst out laughing; I couldn't help it. I wonder how long he thought about that one last night? "That's a great title, Joe, and it rhymes! I absolutely love it. I would have just called it something boring like 'Kite Inventory.'"

*The other day during lunch kids were discussing who was the oldest in our room. Rico raised his hand confidently that he was the oldest (that surprised me...I'll have to check records...). Anyway, I hear someone say, "No he's not. Mrs. Teacher is the oldest!"

I then spoke up. "Oh great," I said. "Rub it in!"

Cathy then speaks up. "I can't believe that you don't care if we know how old you are," she said. "I've never had a teacher tell us her age before."

I looked at her. "Oh, there's nothing wrong with being 29," I said. "I don't think that's too old."

Cathy said, "Aren't you 30 yet?"

"No, not yet," I replied.

Someone else in the room said, "Wow, you are younger than my mom! She's 31!"

I really think they'll believe that I'm 29 all year long!

A Matter of Priorities

2010-12-31T16:28:00.000-08:00

I was in the check out line today at Fred Myer, buying some storage containers to pack away Christmas decorations. I was by myself, and was lost in thought, when this guy behind made a comment about something that sounded like the topic was sports. I glanced back to see who he was talking to, and it seemed as if he was talking to me.

"Are you talking football to me?" I asked. He indicated that he was, and then said something about the Seahawks. "If you want to talk football, I'm not the one to talk to," I said. "I don't like football."

"Well, you won't after this weekend. They are going to lose," he said.

I couldn't believe he was continuing to talk to me about football, when I told him I do not like football and do not watch the Seahawks. "What bothers me about football, or any sport really, is that the players can be interviewed and will say how they had an off season, but next season will be better, and they still make their huge salaries. What other profession can you say, 'Sorry, I had an off year, but next year I'll do better...', and still get your pay? I teach, and I sure couldn't get away with that. A doctor couldn't. A policeman couldn't. But for some reason we accept this from a professional sports player. It's ridiculous."

He agreed. Maybe he was afraid not to agree with me. I paid for my things and left. The world will be a better place when doctors, police, firemen, and teachers make the salaries a professional sports player makes, and they make what I make.

Rhetorical Questions

2010-12-21T06:33:00.000-08:00

Last Friday was the last school day before Winter Break. I swear, it seems like most every kid brought me a gift. I've never had a year like that in my little school. It was gift bags galore on my desk.

I opened each gift during the kids' lunch time. Since my kids eat in the class, I would call each one up to my desk as I opened their gift. Then I could thank the child profusely right then and there. The kids just really like watching their teacher open their gift. I got my share of mugs, coffee, candles, and Christams tree ornaments (my favorites).

Finally, the last gift I opened was Josh's gift. I called him over. He stood in front of me as I got his present on my lap. I looked at him and said, "This is so exciting...I wonder what you got me?"

"Oh, it's just coffee," he replied.

I gave Josh an impromptu lesson about rhetorical questions.

The Guilty Never Feel Guilt

2010-12-19T10:30:00.000-08:00

We just got out Friday for two sweet weeks of winter break. About 1 1/2 weeks ago, Cathy gave me a present. It was in a gift bag, and it was a set of homemade cards her grandmother (who volunteers in my class each week) made, and a large bag of candy that looked like a bag of M&Ms. I thanked her profusely and left the bag sitting on my desk. Throughout that week a few more gifts trickled in that I added to the collection on my desk.

Then on Wednesday of just this last week, I got a craving for a little something sweet, and remembered the bag of candy from Cathy. I excitedly went back to my room and peeked in the gift bag. There was the set of homemade cards, but no bag of candy. Hmmmm. Did I take that bag home? I was certain I hadn't. What happened to the bag of candy? Did someone really steal a bag of candy out of a gift bag off of my desk? Was it a student? That week I was out for the second part of the day on Monday and Tuesday, so did a sub take it? The night custodian? I was flummoxed, to say the least.

I sent an email to the other 5th grade teacher telling that someone had stolen a bag of candy from me that I had gotten as a gift. She was appalled, and replied that one of the 4th grade teachers last year had had a gift stolen. A fourth grade teacher? Could that student now have moved to fifth grade in my class and is still stealing? I sent an email to the fourth grade teacher to see who had stolen from her. It had been Jack.

You may remember Jack. He is the one who lied to me about selling 20 items during the PTA fundraiser just to get 20 free Silly Bands. I sent an email to my husband telling him that someone had stolen from me, and replied to just lay on the Mommy Guilt, which he said, rightly so, that I am good at. So I did.

After their lunch was over, I told the class that up till now, I have been bragging about this class, and what a wonderful, kind bunch of kids I have. I laid it on thick. Then I told them that someone stole a bag of candy that Cathy had given me. Someone had stolen it right out of a gift bag off my desk. I told the students how hurt I was that one of MY students would do that to me. I ended the guilt trip by saying that I hoped whomever had stolen from me would feel so much guilt that either the candy would be returned, or that s/he wouldn't be able to truly enjoy the candy, knowing it was stolen candy. I let them know how sad and hurt I was.

I then pulled Jack out in the hall for a private chat. "Jack," I said. "Did you steal my candy?" He emphatically said no, but I don't really trust him. I told him that he has made bad decisions in the past with stealing candy from Mrs. Fourth Grade Teacher last year, and then lying about the Silly Bands to me this year. "You haven't shown yourself to be a responsible, reliable student because of the choices you have made. If you really didn't steal from me, I'm glad, but you had better work hard at changing your reputation." I still think he did it.

The next day I got to school and checked my email. There was an email from Sandra, who never does anything wrong. In fact, this month I chose her for the Responsibility award. Anyway, in her email she first reminded me that I had forgotten to include the spelling assignment on my homework page, and she was concerned that some kids would forget to do it because it wasn't there, and they'd get into trouble. Then she went on to say how very sorry she was that someone stole candy from me, and that she hoped it would be returned soon. She said she hoped I'd still be able to brag about our class, because it made her feel good to think that I brag about them. Finally, she ended the email saying that I was the best, coolest, and PRETTIEST teacher she has ever had!

I think both Sandra and I were feeling guilt now.

But I am the prettiest teacher she's ever had? Really? I thought my days of being called pretty by a student were long gone...But I had to know who had her in fourth grade, so I could rub it in. I went to the staff room where the fourth grade teachers, among others, were eating lunch. "OK," I said. "Who had Sandra B. last year?" They thought, and then said the name of a teacher who is no longer here. "Oh," I said, disappointed. But the another teacher spoke up.

"I had Sandra for third grade," she said. Hmmm. Really? This particular teacher is fairly young. She just got married, and is only in her third or fourth year of teaching. So I gently broke the news to her. "Well, I want you to know that Sandra said I am the prettiest teacher she's ever had. I'm sorry for you, but I'm quite excited, since I'm nearly twice your age!"

Basically, the ones who feel the guilt are usually the ones that don't do wrong anyway.

Fam-i-ly

2010-12-18T18:31:00.000-08:00

The other day I was going from my classroom to the teacher workroom during my break to cut some paper for a project. My classroom is in the "5th/6th bay," which is a separate building from the rest of the school (I try not to take it personally). To go to the workroom, the office, pe, or anywhere, I must cross the playground to the main group of buildings.

So I was crossing the playground with my paper to cut in hand. Now, our school campus is surrounded by a chain link fence. In the morning when the kids arrive to school, a gate in the fence is open for them to walk through, but during the day, it is chained shut. As I passed this gate, I saw a small boy pulling the gate in as far as the chain would allow,and was trying to squeeze through the narrow opening.

"Hey!" I called out. "What are you doing? You can't be there!" He stopped and turned around. "You need to go out onto the playground," I continued. He turned and began to walk towards the playground, but then he just leaned against a wall and burst into tears. I walked over.

"What's the matter? Why are you crying?" I asked.

"I don't have a friend," he sobbed.

"How come?" I asked. He just cried. So I took his little hand. "You come with me," I said. "I'm going to find someone to talk with you. But first, I have to cut some paper, so you'll just have to come with me." He obediently came with me without complaint, still holding my hand.

I continued to talk to him as we entered the teacher work room. There was one parent in there. "Are you a new student?" I asked. I wondered if he had just started at our school and hadn't yet made a good friend. But no, he said he had been at our school since the first day. "Who is your teacher?" I asked. He replied that it one of the kindergarten teachers. So the plot thickened.

I asked him why he didn't have a friend, and he said he had one earlier but didn't know where he had gone. "So I was going to go home because I miss my family," he said, pronouncing it fam-i-ly, and beginning to cry all over again. The other mom in the room and I looked at each other and gave one of those "Aaaaah..." looks that moms give. I walked him to the office.

Once there, I waited until Mr. Principal was free. Then I told him that this little boy had tried to go home because he couldn't find a friend and missed his family. He thanked me, and took over.

Those little kids are so cute! I couldn't teach them, but I sure enjoy them!

A Life Sentence

2010-12-14T17:55:00.000-08:00

I use a certain brand of deoderant, and a while ago I found a scent that I really like. It's called "pure cashmere." Doesn't that sound great? It smells wonderful, too. Very fresh. Not perfumey.

But I've discovered that it's very difficult to find in stores. I always look for it. If I'm lucky enough to find my scent, I buy as many as they have on the shelf. Therefore, I've smelt great for quite some time.

But my stash began to dwindle, and I wasn't finding replacements. Then the other day I wondered if Drugstore.com would have any. So I went there, and sure enough, they showed that they had my "pure cashmere" scent. I was so excited. I ordered ten of them! I figured I was set for life.

Today they came. I eagerly opened the box. I pulled out a deoderant stick, and opened the lid. And sniffed. But it didn't smell great. It smelled perfumey. I looked again at the container, and it said "Smooth Perfection," but I couldn't see "Pure Cashmere" anywhere on the label. Did I order the wrong thing? I wondered. I looked at the packing slip and it said "Smooth Perfection." Oh, geez. I thought. I did screw it up.

I went to the computer to find my shipping notice. I'm good at saving all of my shipping notices until I actually get the product. The shipping notice definitely said "Pure Cashmere." I looked again at a label. It said "Smooth Perfection" in large bold letters. In smaller letters, at the bottom, it said "Pure Cashmere." Hmmm.

I went upstairs and got the stick of deoderant I was using right now. I decided what I needed to do was a sniff test. I took my deoderant downstairs. I got one of the new sticks of deoderant. I opened both sticks. I sniffed my current one. Mmmm...fresh scent! Then I sniffed the new one. Yuk. Perfume.

And with 10 sticks, this is how I'll smell for the rest of my life.

In the Eye of the Beholder

2010-12-14T17:49:00.000-08:00

This morning, as the kids came into the room, Jack grins at me as he walked past. "I've got something for you," he said.

Now, over the past couple of weeks he has been giving me little wrapped candy canes. That's what I thought he brought for me again. It's sweet, really, as yesterday I really "chewed" him out (pun intended) for eating sunflower seeds in the room. I made him empty his pockets and throw everthing away.

So I'm at my desk, and he proudly comes over. He hands me a store-bought cookie. Unwrapped. In his hand.

"Jack!" I exclaimed. "You brought me a cookie? You've been holding it in your hand all morning, just waiting to give it to me?"

"Yup!" he answered, proudly.

I gave him a big hug. "That's the nicest thing anyone has done for me today!"

Later, I threw the cookie away. Blah.

Be a Parent, Please

2010-12-04T08:45:00.000-08:00

Jack is one of my students. He's difficult. I am not sure if he has a learning disability or an emotional disability, but whichever it is, he does not do well academically because of it. He will simply refuse to do work in a passive-aggressive way. He and I had several bouts of this at the beginning of the year, but then it seemed he wouldn't do this with me any longer. I'm pretty firm with kids. But he would do this with subs and with para-educators if he was pulled out in a small group for math or reading. There was one week where he pulled this with three different adults. That week I sent an email to our pricipal, asking him to talk seriously with Jack, since I was appalled that he would defy an adults' request like that.

Anyway, at conference time I talked with his mom extensively about this behavior. She said he is also this way at home, and he is her only child that acts this way. Lucky for her, too, since she is pregnant with her ninth child...That's right. 9. But she really had no advice for me, not that I expected any. Last year's teacher told my that if she had to really scare Jack about something, she'd have him call Dad, not Mom. Mom did say that if I ever needed her to just come get him, she would. But the reality of that is is that Jack then doesn't get his education he needs, but gets the attention from mom. And when you consider he is currently one of eight (soon to be nine) kids, her probably craves that attention. His mom even told me she has considered home schooling him. Really? With 50 toddlers at home and soon a new-born? I don't think so. Jack's mom also said that her husband told her not to worry about him, that he wasn't a good student in school but he eventually came around, and that they should just get Jack into sports. I told mom to tell dad that if he can't pass his state tests in school, he won't be ABLE to participate in any sports...

Anyway, November in school is pretty much a lost month due to a full conference week of half-days, and then right after that we were hit with a snow storm that closed school for two days right up to Thanksgiving vacation. Last Monday was the beginning of our normal schedule for three weeks leading up to the next big kahuna of breaks: Winter break.

Jack came in Monday morning and settled down. We have math first thing in the morning, and he was very attentive, even raising his hand and participating. I was very pleased with him and told him so. The same thing happened on Tuesday. Raised his hand. Participated. Did his work. Focused. I liked this new Jack.

It went that way for math the whole week long. Then Friday came. When my students came in from music, I had their math homework on the board with the correct answers so that they could correct their own work. The kids got busy immediately, either correcting their work or quickly finishing (or copying) their work that they didn't get done the night before. I glanced over at Jack, and he is just sitting there at his desk, doing nothing.

"Jack," I said. "Why aren't you correcting your homework?" He just looked at me. "Jack, take out your Homework and Remembering math book and let me see it." He did as I asked. I flipped the workbook open to Thursday night's homework pages, which were not done what so ever.

"Jack," I said. "You didn't do your homework last night." I flipped back through the other pages that have been assigned since beginning unit three. All homework pages were not done. He has not been doing any of the homework. "Jack," I said. "Why haven't you been doing any of your homework?" He covers his face with his hands and arms and remains silent. I crouch down level with him at his desk. "Jack," I say. "I want you to do last night's homework right now. We'll talk later about all of the homework you haven't done." I stand up to walk away. Jack stays in his upright-fetal position.

I crouch back down to be at his level as he sat at his desk. "Jack," I said quietly and patiently. "You have two choices. You can do your homework from last night right now, or I will write you up on a white slip for not following my directions, and I will send you to talk with Mr. Principal." Still, he just sat there with his face hidden. "All right, Jack. You made your choice."

I chose a dependable student who had finished correcting her work to escort Jack to the office. I made sure Jack took his pencil and math workbook with him. I then sent an email to my principal, explaing in detail why I was sending Jack to the office. "If you can't see him right now," I added in my email, "just send him back and call for him later." But Jack didn't return.

In fact, Jack was at the office all morning long. He came back just as it was time for recess. He handed me the copies of his white slip which showed that he had worked in the office on his math, had had a discussion with the principal, and that his parents needed to sign the slip.

But I went a step further and emailed the parents. I explained everything that happened, including that he had not been doing his homeowork for the last six math lessons. I concluded in my email that I wanted them to check to see that his homework gets completed every night. I asked that they make sure they check my website where I always show the night's homework, and that they initial each homework math page when it is finished.

Time for them to step up and be parents, not just breeders.

Books That Teach

2010-11-12T19:47:00.000-08:00

The other day I was with my fifth graders at the library. I was sitting at a table near the check-out desk, working on a lap top. All of a sudden I "tuned in" to the conversation between the librarian and one of my students who had a book to check out.

Librarian: Where did you get this book?

Student(pointing): On the shelf over there.

Librarian: Well, it's not scanning. It doesn't seem to be in our system any more.

At this point I looked up to see what book they were talking about. It was a book called Everything Your Child Needs to Know in Fifth Grade. The librarian handed me the book. "Since it isn't in our system," she said, "you can have it if you want it."

"Are you kidding?" I exclaimed. "Read that title! Of course I want it!" So I carried it back to class. I then told the kids how excited I was to get that book. "Do you realize," I said, "that absolutely everything you need to know this year is written on the pages of this book?"

I could hardly contain my excitement. I went on. "I think," I continued, "that I'll just keep this book here." I reverently placed the book on the pen tray in front of the room. "With this book, I don't even have to come to school anymore! Each day, one of you can be the teacher, and can just read to the class from this book. I'll be home with my feet up, drinking coffee and reading."

The class was abuzz. Was I kidding, they wondered. Of course I was, some said. But others, they just couldn't be so sure...

The 'I' Word

2010-11-10T19:53:00.000-08:00

This morning the kids were just coming into class, and Kathy comes up to me. "Mrs. Teacher," she said, "Noah called me the 'I' word."

I paused in thought. The 'I' word? Could there possibly be a swear word that began with an I that I didn't know? Or was it maybe a new swear word that I was too old to know?

"The 'I' word? I don't believe I know what word that is...What did he call you?" I asked.

"He called me an idiot," Kathy replied.

Well, it does start with an I, and it wasn't nice, so I told Noah to knock it off. Job well done.

Stats

2010-11-08T18:24:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I discovered the "stats" button on my blog account. Yes, after all these years...And I find it incredible that people are reading my blog. At least, I think they are...Maybe it's just people who want information about Brittany Spears, for example, and get to my blog accidentally because one of my posts is called, "Oops I Did It Again."

I wonder what people think about the things I write. I really thought no one read it unless I forced my friends to read and post. I feel sort of like "Julie and Julia" or "Waiter Rant." Maybe I have a fan base and I didn't even know it. Now what?

Such responsibility.

Making Personal Connections With Math

2010-10-21T18:11:00.000-07:00

Kids-gotta love 'em!

Today we were checking math homework, and there were several word problems on the page. One student asked me to go over a particular problem:

"Jason is tiling a patio. The tiles are each 1 square decimeter. The patio is 6 meters long and 4 meters wide. How many tiles will Jason need?"

Not an easy problem. We worked it out together to show the correct answer. Then Josh raised his hand.

"Teacher, is it ok if I used a different unit?" he asked.

"What unit did you use," I replied.

"Boards," he said. "My patio is made from boards."

I'm sure it all made sense to him...But I highlighted the metric unit measurements, and what the question asked. I drew a red box around the word "tiles."

"Sorry, Josh," I said. "You needed to use tiles."

He still can't understand why you'd tile a patio. Good thing he's joining the military after high school (I'll cross my fingers that he graduates...).

A Jury of His Peers

2010-10-10T09:14:00.000-07:00

Our school is holding a fundraiser right now, one of those fundraisers where the kids are selling gift wrap and the like...But as an incentive to sell, sell, sell, for every item a kid sells, he or she cuts out this snowflake, writes their name and teacher's name on it, and turns it in to the teacher. The teacher then gives that child a "silly band" for every snowflake they turn it. This is on the honor system. The teacher also then turns in all snowflakes received in a given day to the office. A PTA rep counts up the snowflakes per class, and the winning class gets to have Blizzard, a huge stuffed polar bear, in their room for the next day. My class has had Blizzard once as a guest.

So last Wednesday morning, Zeke hands me 20 snowflakes, all filled out with his name and mine on them. I didn't really think much, but figured he just had let them pile up until he finally brought them in. I gave him 20 silly bands. Another student handed me two snowflakes, and I gave him two silly bands. No one else had any snowflakes, so I sent all snowflakes in to the offic. But we weren't the winners of Blizzard for that day, anyway.

The next day, Thursday, about 10 minutes before school was to start, my classroom door opened, and in walked Zeke, followed by his older brother. Zeke handed me a baggie filled with silly bands, along with a handwritten note that said, "I am sorry about the silly bands. Do you agree? Yes or no."

"Zeke," I said. "I don't understand what this note is about."

His brother said, "Zeke stole the silly bands."

Oh, I get it. So I played along..."What do you mean you stole silly bands? You didn't steal them. I gave them to you for the 20 snowflakes you gave me." Zeke looked down at the ground.

"I didn't sell 20 things," he said.

"You mean, you lied to me?" I asked.

"Yes," he replied.

"Wow. I can't believe that. This is serious," I said. "I think you need to talk to Mr. Principal, because you have broken several of our school's traits." So I walked out of the room and headed toward the office, with Zeke behind me. When I got to the office, Mr. Principal was not there. He was out of the building for the morning. So I told Zeke that I'd have to fill out a white slip and give it to Mr. Principal.

I went back to my room and filled out a white slip. I headed back to the office with the white slip. When I got to the office, one of our administrators was there, and she often deals with discipline issues. So I gave her the slip, and briefly told her of the situation. "I think we need to shake him up," I concluded. She agreed.

Later, she came to my room and pulled Zeke out into the hall. After a bit, she poked her head back into my room. "Mrs. Teacher, can you come here?" she asked. I stepped into the hall. She basically had Zeke apologize to me. I pointed out that what concerned me was that note he had originally written in that it didn't really say exactly what he had done wrong: lied to me and stole silly bands. She agreed. I stepped back into the room, and she talked to him some more. Eventually he came back in to the room.

At lunch time, I went to the office to my mailbox. Inside was Zeke's white slip, minus the copy that the office keeps. But written on the slip under consequences was an additonal note from our principal that Zeke had to apologize to the whole class. So as the kids came in from recess, I pulled Zeke into the hallway.

"Mr.Principal says that you have to also apologize to the whole class," I told him.

"What do I say?" he asked.

"You'r a fifth grader. I'm sure you can figure it out," I said, and went back into class.

At 3:00, with only a half hour left in the day, I called the class together. "Zeke, come up here," I said. Zeke came up and stood in front of the class. "Zeke has something to tell you," I added.

Zeke stood there in front of his peers, staring down at the floor. Then he looked up. "Yesterday, I turned in 20 snowflakes and got 20 silly bands, but I lied. I didn't really sell anything."

Well, you could have heard a pin drop. I told the kids that if they had any questions for Zeke, they should ask them, and Zeke would answer truthfully. And the questions began, fast and furious. No holds barred. They were like the Spanish Inquistion, and they asked tough questions: Why did you do it? How did you feel when you lied? Why did you do this just to make yourself feel better? Would you have told the truth if you hadn't been caught? The questions went on for about 15 minutes. I had to stop them finally because we had to get ready to go home.

It was the best punishment ever.

Oops, I Did It Again!

2010-10-02T21:15:00.000-07:00

I let my students earn their first class reward. You know what I do with the blanks on the board that will spell out their reward. And how I like to put up the wrong letters to keep the kiddos guessing.

The reward was "board games." But when I told the students that they had earned their reward, and then filled in the blanks, I wrote, "extra tests."

I proudly turned to them to see their excited little faces. But what was this? They didn't seem to be too thrilled. "Guys," I said. "Congratulations! You have earned you first class reward!" I turned to the board, and then turned back, announcing grandly, "Extra tests!"

"That's not a reward...that's a punishment!" one student said. They all groaned. But I just continued with the day as if nothing was unusual.

But right before second recess, I looked at the reward on the board before excusing them. "Oh, guys," I said. "I made a huge mistake. Extra Tests is supposed to be your second reward! I'm sorry to break the news to you, but this isn't your reward..." And then I wrote the letters in the blank to spell "board games."

Cheering ensued. Now I saw happy little faces. It's so much fun to play this way...

A Man of Many Moods

2010-09-28T20:58:00.000-07:00

Today I was reading a story called The Rough Faced Girl to my students. It is a Native American version of Cinderella, pretty much. Anyway, in the story, a character is said to be able to "see into one's heart..." and to know if the person had a kind, good heart, or a cold, evil one.

I had the kids sitting up around me on the floor. John was sitting very near me. John is not very bright. He said to me, "Mrs. Teacher, what does a cold heart mean?"

I explained that someone who has a cold heart is mean and cruel and would only think about themself. On the other hand, I continued to explain, a warm-hearted person was kind and loving.

John thought for a minute. "Hmm..." he said. "I guess I'm somewhere in the middle..."

I told him that perhaps he might work on moving more toward the kind-hearted side and away from the cold-hearted side...

The Data Proves I'm Right

2010-09-24T19:40:00.000-07:00

The first week of school we had to give our students this math test. It was a math test on the concepts we'd be teaching this year. That's right. Sort of like my quote, actually, from Willy Wonka: This year we'll take a math test on the concepts we're going to learn before we learn them!

The next week I got an email from our Curriculum Specialist. "Be sure to send me all of your math test scores," she wrote.

I replied, "In what form are we to send the information? Do you want the percentage correct? How was each question weighted? Is each question worth one point? Do we have a rubric to go by that shows how to correlate each score to a number, like our progress reports?"

I didn't get an adequate answer, so I chose to do nothing. The next day I was leaving school around 5 pm or 5:30 pm. I cut through the library, and passed our Curriculum Specialist's office. "Julie," she cried excitedly. "I have something for you!"

I put my head into her office. "What is it? Chocolate?" I ask hopefully.

"No," she said. "Better. Here's a chart you can use to input the kids' math scores from that test!"

I looked at the intricate boxes from her excell sheet. "Oh," I said. "And how do I use it?"

She looked at it. "Well, I don't know," she replied, "but we need to have those scores so that we know who to help!"

"Oh, I can tell you who needs math help. You need to help Kasey, Pashton, Josh, Issabelle, and Cheyenne."

"But we need the data. We are a data-driven school."

I took those tests home and corrected them. The highest score was a 69%. The boy in my class who scored the highest on the state math test in 4th grade received a score that was just right in the middle of the group. The lowest score was a 19%. I inputted all of my test percent scores onto the excell spread sheet. Guess who the bottom five scores belonged to? That's right: Kasey, Pashton, Josh, Issabelle, and Cheyenne. Just as I said.

But thank god we now have the data to prove it.

Stalker

2010-09-20T18:45:00.000-07:00

I have a student, Arden, who is an only child. Last year's teacher told me that he can't go outside on cold, rainy days, which is just about every day here in the Pacific Northwest. So the teacher said that on days he couldn't go outside he hung out in the classroom. Well, I knew this wouldn't work for me. When it is recess, it is my planning time, and no kid stays in. Unless I say so.

I think this boy is over-protected. His mom was telling me of some complications when he was first born, but even the nurse at our school said she thinks this staying in on cold days is ridiculous.

Well, this has been an unusually rainy September, and the other day it was raining when I excused the kids for their 15-minute recess break. Arden showed no signs of even moving from the class.

"Arden," I said. "You can't stay here. I have some errands to do and I can't leave you here by yourself." He begins to get his things, and follows me out of the classroom door. He continues to follow me out of the building door, and across the playground. I think maybe he's on his way to find his mom, as she works as an aide at our school.

I head towards the workroom to use the restroom. Arden followed me into the workroom. I wonder how he knows his mom is in there. She isn't. I open the door to the restroom, and when he sees where I'm going, he just sort of stands outside the door. He's stalking me, and I can't go. So I just wash my hands and come out.

I walk over to Arden and put my arm around his shoulders. "Arden," I say. "Are you following me?"

"Yes," he replies.

"Well, you can't do that," I say. "If the weather is too bad for you to be outside, you have to either go to wherever your mom will be, or take a book and sit in the office. You won't be able to hang out with me."

I really couldn't believe that he thought he could just tag after me like a little puppy. This is fifth grade, and it's time to grow up a bit. His mom probably likes me less now.

New Year, New Stories

2010-09-17T19:39:00.000-07:00

Welcome to a new year of students, and a new crop of stories!

The other day I was telling my students about the trip I made to the fair this summer. One of the best things I did at the fair was go through the petting farm, which, of course, is made for little tots. As I relayed the story to my students, I told them I was 29...

The next day, I was passing out some papers. As I passed one girl, she said, "Mrs. Teacher, are you really 29?"

"Yes," I replied.

"Then you are the same age as Mrs. Carsen! She's 29, too..."

(Obviously, I'm not the only teacher who lies about her age...Mrs. Carson is actually a couple years younger than me!)

Another students said, "But I think Mrs. Carsen had a birthday, so she's 30 now."

"Oh," I said. "She's older than me then." The two girls nodded in agreement.

Days later, I was busy in front of the class. I was actually making peanut butter and jam sandwiches, following directions written by student pairs as I try to get them thinking about writing a clear, precise procedure. It's a fun activity.

Anyway, I had been following the student directions, ending up with all kinds of funny looking PB&Js. One boy was sitting up close to me. He finally said to me, "Mrs. Teacher, did they have peanut butter sandwiches when you were a kid?"

"Yes, they did," I answered seriously.

Another boy asked, "How about turkey?"

I couldn't be serious anymore..."How old do you think I am?" I laughed.

"Well," kids replied. "You said you were 29..."

I love the gullibility of 5th graders.

Small Town, USA

2010-08-18T08:14:00.000-07:00

I like living in a small town. We have only lived here six years now, but I feel like I know everyone! When I go to any kid-function, I know, or at least am familiar with, many people. I run into people I know at the store all the time. It's fun, that small-town feel.

So I just had to laugh at something that has transpired this summer, a great example of small-town living where news travels fast and everyone is in everyone else's business. A couple weeks ago my husband came home from his eye checkup. "You need to talk to the doctor, because he is considering whether to start his daughter in kindergarten this year, and she won't be five until October."

He went on to fill me in on the discussion he had with the doctor about his almost-five year old daughter. She's bright and is beginning to read. She very social and loves meeting people. She's tall. Now, these are good things. But she's still four, and if she starts school this fall, she will be in a class with kids who are about two years older than her, some of them. I was incredulous, because had I had a child with a fall birthday, I would have been elated! I would not have started them until they were five turning six, and I'd know they'd be a class leader.

Well, I had my eye appointment the next day, so I brought up this subject with the doctor. We discussed it at length. He gave me all the reasons why he and his wife were considering starting his daughter early. She had gone through some testing and tested above average on everything except for fine-motor skills (which is very important to school success, by the way). I was pretty straight-forward with my opinion AS A TEACHER, though, and pointed out all of the reasons why it would be best to wait a year. She'd be one of the oldest and a leader, instead of one of the youngest who would be a follower. And as she got older, think of puberty. Think of learning to drive. Think of peer pressure. And why is it a rush to get a kid into and through school? It shouldn't be a race. They obviously have money (I didn't say that) to give her a last year of enriching activities before the formality of school. I encouraged him to contact the school's principal; I don't know of any educator worth anything that would encourage a parent to enroll a four-year-old into kindergarten, and it turned out his daughter wouldn't be five until November! That's even worse.

I felt he listened to and appreciated my input as a teacher. I felt that I had really given him some things to think about, and figured he'd go home and really discuss it with his wife.

Yesterday my hubby and I stopped at the eye care place to pick up hubby's glasses (mine haven't come in yet, darn it; they are so cool...). The doctor came out with a patient, and as he was saying goodbye, the patient said, "Good luck with your Kindergartener! They grow so fast..."

What? Doctor, didn't you listen to me? I take your professional advice about my eyes but you can't take my professional advice about your daughter's education? I was pretty upset about this, as I felt he'd be making a mistake.

But here's where the small-town living comes into play. Later that day we went to the grocery store where we ran into the gal who was my younger daughter's third-grade teacher. We stopped to chat there in the produce section, and I was admiring her new baby. Her older daughter was also there, a tall girl. I asked, "Are you going into kindergarten," forgetting how old she was. My younger daughter's teacher said, "Not until next year. She won't be five until December."

"Good for you," I said. "She'll be one of the oldest kids and a leader." Not that I had to tell another teacher this, especially one who has taught kindergarten for the last three years. "You won't be making a mistake like my eye doctor is..." and I proceeded to tell her all about that situation. Her response to it was exactly like mine, and she also said that the district would not let them put her into kindergarten. "Who is your doctor," she asked. I told her. Turns out, he's her doctor, too (not a lot of options here in this town, but he's a good one). She decided it was time to get an eye checkup, and she'd give the doctor her opinion as well. Maybe he'll pay attention given she's taught kindergarten, and would be telling him the same things I told him. Maybe hearing the same message of "Don't Do It" from two different educators will make him rethink this kindergarten idea.

Poor doctor, though. That's what he gets for being in a small town.

The Only Way To Fly!

2010-07-17T22:52:00.000-07:00

I didn't yet tell you about my trip to New Orleans to attend the National Education Association Representative Assembly conference. I had gone for the first time to such a conference last year in San Diego. This year I was elected by my peers to be a state delegate to the NEA convention for two years. This year it was in New Orleans and next year it will be in Chicago.

I had lots of fun in New Orleans (although not as much fun as I had wanted...), but what I want to focus on was my flight to and from New Orleans. That seems to be the story I've been telling over and over.

To start with, my flight out of Seattle was delayed 2.5 hours. Right from the get-go I was behind schedule. My flight was to fly out of Seattle to Salt Lake City, where I was slated to have a 2.5 relaxing (if not boring) layover before getting a flight to New Orleans. But that was not to be.

As I said, my first flight out of Seattle was late. When I finally boarded the plane (a small plane that only had about 20 rows with two seats on each side of the aisle), I asked the flight attendant why there had been a delay. She honestly (but wrongly) informed me that the plane had had an "aborted take off" in Houston. Aborted take off? What does that mean? Did the plane actually begin to take off and leave the ground, and then had to return to earth? Or did something happen before they even tried to take off? Those details are important. But more important was: Has this plane flown successfully since then?

The flight attendant assured me that the plane had flown successfully from Houston to Seattle. I felt a bit better. However, given our delay in taking off, our arrival in Salt Lake City was approximately a half hour after my scheduled flight had left for New Orleans, and there wasn't any other flight to take that day. Delta gave me a $400 ticket voucher, a $6 dinner voucher, and put me up in a hotel for the night. I spent more than $6 on my turkey sandwich and lemonade...And the hotel was not that great...I also cried a bit because I was by myself in Salt Lake City instead of with my teacher friends in New Orleans eating Gumbo.

The next day, early, I caught my new flight that was to go from SLC to Atlanta. The plane was there without incident and boarded on time. I was sitting between two guys; the younger one was on his way to Pensacola FL to do work pertaining to the BP oil spill. That was interesting, but he was a quiet guy who didn't talk much. The other guy was a frequent flyer for business returning home to Atlanta. He was a reassuring traveler and somewhat calmed my flying fears. But I was travel-weary. And a nervous flyer. (In fact, last year when we all flew home from California, I insited on holding both my daughters' hands at take off. Stella wondered whose hand I'd hold on this trip...) The trip was a smooth one for the most part, except for landing in Atlanta. It was very bumpy. I was told that it is always bumpy flying into or out of Atlanta, and those in the know try to fly out of Atlanta in the early morning or late part of the day. By the time we landed and I got off the plane, I had a very short window of time to get to my connecting flight to New Orleans. I can now say I've been to Georgia, although I only went through the airport...at a fast pace. I did make my connecting flight, much to my relief. It was another small plane that seemed to just hit every mysterious bump in the air. It really was the worst flight ever. Eventhough it was only an hour flight. There were many times I was sure we'd be knocked right out of the air.

But we weren't. We made it one piece, and I got to New Orleans. I told myself that if my luggage made it, all would be forgiven. And sure enough, when I went to baggage claim, there was my suitcase with its "I Love Baggage Handlers!" tag. Not bothering with the line at the NEA shuttle booth, I just grabbed my suitcase and headed out to get a taxi. I made it to New Orleans, navigating through three unfamiliar airports on my own. I was quite proud.

But I haven't yet even gotten to the "only way to fly" part of my travel story. It happened on my return flight. I flew Delta airlines on my way down, but for my return journey I flew Continental (*note* Continental Airlines were on time with no problems). I flew out of New Orleans at 7:20 in the morning, so had gotten very little sleep the night before, and had gotten up early to get to the airport. My first part of the flight home was to fly from NO to Houston TX. This was just a one hour flight. I was nervous, though, because I only had about a half hour to make my connecting flight in Houston. After my recent experience, I fully expected to miss it.

The plane I was in to Houston was the smallest yet on my journey. Again there were only about 20 rows with two seats on one side of the aisle, and a single seat on the other side. I was in a single seat. In the last row. I had assumed that since we were in a smaller plane we wouldn't fly as high, but I was wrong. We took off and climbed and climbed, and banked at crazy angles. Finally we went through a layer of clouds, and it was bright and sunny. This is good, I thought. I could see land below, which always comforts me. Let's just stay here. But no, the pilot thought he knew better. He could go higher. And he did. He climbed up through the second layer of clouds. Now I couldn't see land below me-just clouds. That makes me nervous. But we did arrive safely in Houston on time, and it being such a small plane, it didn't take long to empty out (and now I can also say I've been to Texas). I did have to book it to my connecting flight, which involved follwing signs (Is gate D in Concourse D, I wondered.) and getting onto a train. But I successfully found my correct gate just as they were finishing boarding.

I found my aisle, and since I had a window seat and the other two passengers were already there, they had to move for me, forcing me to apologize and smile. As we settled back into our seats and put on our seatbelts, I began to chat with the pleasant looking gal next to me. She appeared to be in her mid to later 50s. She had a heavy Southern accent. Turns out she was from Mississippi and was headed to Seattle to welcome her son back from Iraq. As we chatted, I told her how nervous I get flying. She said she does too, and that's why she has Zanax (sp?).

She cast a glance at the big guy sitting next to her, and whispered to me, "Do you think he's a cop?" She decided no, or decided he wouldn't notice, and she pulled out her prescription container and shook out a pill. "Here," she said. "Take this. It will relax you."

I looked at the little harmless pill, and debated for a second. It seemed to go against everything I had been taught. But I was tired and nervous, and this was a long flight of 3.5 hours. So I took it. I didn't even have water. It was so little I could just swallow it with a minimum of bitter taste. Soon we took off, right on schedule. I was still nervous, and didn't really feel like I was feeling any effects. The plane (a 737 this time) took off and climbed and climbed. I still felt every bump, and when the engine sound would change, I would notice. But soon we seemed to level off. And I was tired. Really, really tired. I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before. And the Zanax was kicking in. My tray was down, as I had been given a light breakfast. I just laid my head in my arms onto my tray, and fell asleep. When I woke, I could see that we were flying over very dry looking country. I got out my flight plan map to try to determine where we were. I thought maybe we were flying over Wyoming, as much of that is dry country, but I searched in vain for the Tetons, seeing nothing. As I still pondered where exactly we were, the pilot makes an announcement that we will be descending soon! Really? We are already in Washington? Wow-I slept the whole way home. The dry countryside I was seeing was Eastern Washington, and soon Rainier was visible. Home sweet home. Landing is the best; it feels good to come down to the ground.

And Zanax? I'm thinking that it is the only way to fly!

Sometimes I'm Closed Minded

2010-07-15T21:52:00.000-07:00

All right. Yes. I messed up.

I was summonsed back in April for jury duty. At that time, I didn't want to have to be gone from class. The state testing was coming up, and I needed to be in school preparing my students, as best I could, for these tests. So, I deferred my jury service. You can defer your jury time any time up to one year of the first summons.

For some inane reason, I chose July 12. Now, I had no intention of actually getting on to a jury. I've been on a jury twice before, so I have done my duty. I guess I chose July 12 because I thought (1) I'd just have gotten back from the NEA convention in New Orleans, and (2) it was the last week that my girls were involved in their summer stock musical camp. I figured I could report for two days and that would be it.

I reported on Monday. I sat around in the jury room, and eventually was called to be one of 35 potential jurors for a case. I was a safe 27. We were led to the court room by the bailiff. The case was a civil case; a woman was suing a major furniture/home store because she tripped on something metal in their parking garage. Even this trial was to take a week. Luckily, being number 27, I never really made it into the jury box; the jury was approved by both lawyers before my number came up. Good.

I reported back to the courthouse the next day. I sat in the same holding room, reading, until they dismissed us for lunch at 11:30. We weren't to report back until 1:30. Two hours. I went and got myself something to eat, and then went to the nearby outdoor mall. I got some items for my younger daughter who was turning 12 on Thursday. I eventually made my way back to the courthouse and checked in, where I continued to read. Finally, finally, they called out the names of 60 potential jurors. They called my name.

I went up and got the questionaire they required of us. Hmmm. The trial yesterday didn't have a questionaire. As I read the questions, I guessed the reason. The case yesterday was a simple civil case of a "fall and sue" type. These questions, however, were about child abuse, sexual abuse, sexual abuse of a minor, non-custodial parents, etc. I could guess what the trial was going to be about. No wonder they needed 60 potential jurors when the civil case from yesterday only needed 35.

After a bit, the bailiff led us into the courtroom. The judge greeted us, and then gave a brief overview of the case. This man sitting in front of us had been charged with the rape of a thirteen year old girl two years ago. I knew the case would be something like this, and I knew I could not be open minded enough to do this case, even if I wanted to. I had answered "yes" on the questionaire to the question that asked, in so many words, if we would be biased to a case about sexual abuse of a minor. Yes, yes, yes, I'd be biased...especially when the victim is the same age now as my older daughter.

So I sat through the opening intro of this case, and when the judge told us how long it was expected to go, and we were to speak up if this was a hardship, I remained silent. I knew from the day before that they would then be asking us if we could remain impartial with this case, and I would speak up that no, there was no way in hell I could be impartial, and they'd excuse me. So I just sat and listened while 25 of the 60 jurors gave their reasons why they couldn't be available for the case, and were excused by the judge.

Then, however, it was 4:30, and the judge decided to excuse us all for the day, and we were to come back the next day. Now the third day of jury duty that I had not counted on.

I came back the next day, the third day. I checked in and sat in the holding room. I sat and read, and sat and read. My butt hurt. Finally they told us that they were waiting for more jurors since so many had left the day before, so we were all excused for lunch until 1:30. 1:30? This was not my plan. I could see this day stretching out with nothing being decided, and then I'd be told to come back again the next day. A fourth day. And Stella's 12th birthday. No way.

I walked around town, going to a little bookstore and buying some books for my girls. It was a beautiful day-the kind of beautiful Pacific Northwest day without any clouds and temps in the upper 70s. I regretfully returned to the courthouse at the appointed time with dread in my heart. I could not let this continue on to the next day! Stella would cry.

I returned to the third floor this time and not the holding room. But still, I waited and waited. Finally about 2 pm the bailiff came and led us into the courtroom. The judge then called out the first set of juror numbers. That group was to remain in the courtroom. I wasn't one. I was glad.

Then he called out a second group of jurors. Those jurors were to return the next day at 9 am. I could tell by the numbers he called that these people were jurors who had reported that day for jury duty, whereas I had been there two days prior. But, still I thought maybe I'd be excused because of the way I had answered questions on my questionaire.

But no. The judge told us that anyone who wasn't called in the first two groups were to report THE NEXT DAY at 11 am. Damn! I just couldn't report the next day-it was Stella's birthday! She was already a bit disappointed that she had play practice that night so she couldn't go to the Rainforest Cafe for dinner. I couldn't understand why I had to come back when I knew eventually they'd excuse me because the defense would not want me on the jury.

So, when the judge asked if anyone had any questions, I was one who raised my hand. I asked if I could speak to the bailiff when we were through. A couple other people asked the same. The judge made a joke about the bailiff's popularity. When we finished, and walked out into the hall, I waited for the bailiff.

The first guy told her he was a diabetic, and wouldn't be able to handle the afternoons. Then it was my turn. I was shaking, but told her that not only was I a mom of two girls, one of which was the same age as the girl in the case, but I was also an elementary teacher. I told her that my whole life pretty much revolved around kids and keeping them safe, happy, and pointing in the right direction. I told her there was no way I could be open minded about this case, and I didn't even want to have to listen to any details. After listening to the third guy, she went back into the courtroom. About 10 minutes later she came out. She excused the diabetic. And she excused me. Thanks goodness.

That night on the news I heard how two guys who had been in prison for 17 years for the rape of a woman had been proven, through DNA, to be innocent. They were released. So it does happen that someone can be wrongfully accused, I guess. I just don't want to be part of it.

Who's In Charge Here?

2010-06-17T19:55:00.000-07:00

Viktor has been a real pain in the butt the past few weeks. I'm not sure why. Today, when I went to get the kids from recess, the recess teacher pulled me over and talked to me for about 10 minutes about Viktor's behavior at recess. Apparently, he was with the boys playing soccer on the field, but was harrassing others and tripping them.

So I led my class inside. Viktor comes in, looking rather sour-faced. I remind him that we have a movie scheduled for the afternoon, and if he can't behave, he'll be sitting in the office instead. He talks back to me. And argues with me. And tells me that he did not get into trouble at recess. Hmmm. I yanked him from watching the movie.

While the kids were at pe later in the day, I sent an email to the office, saying that Viktor would be coming to the office around 1:40 with work as he had lost the privelege of seeing a movie with the rest of the class. When the kids got back from pe, and I started the movie, I sent Viktor to the office. He had a lot of work to do on his ABC of 5th Grade Memories book.

He came back in about 15 minutes. "Viktor, why are you here?" I asked.

"I finished," he replied.

"I don't care," I said. "We are watching a movie and you lost the right to be able to watch it with us. Go back to the office."

Later, I see our recess teacher peering into my room. I went to the door. She asked me some question; I don't remember what. Then she wondered when our movie would be finished because Viktor wanted to know when he could come back to class. I told her that it would play for most of the rest of the day.

About 10 minutes after that, another gal in the office called the room over the intercom. "Mrs. Teacher?" she said. I turned down the volume on the movie. "Yes..." I replied.

"Is your movie almost done? Viktor would like to know when he can come back," she asked.

"No, it is not almost done," I replied. "I will let the office know when it is over."

Finally at about 3:20, I stopped the movie. It was soon going to be time to get ready to go home, and it was a good stopping point in the movie. I decided that we can watch the last 10-15 minutes tomorrow. Then I called the office, and told them that they could send Viktor back to class for dismissal.

After all the kids had finally left for the day, I went to check my emails. I hadn't checked them all afternoon while the movie played. There were many emails. One was from our Education Assisstant.

"Is you movie over yet? Viktor wants to know when he can return to class..."

If you ask me, as far the office was concerned, Viktor was calling all the shots this afternoon.

2 More Days (Unbelievably)

2010-06-16T21:40:00.001-07:00

Today Derrell was back from vacation. His family had gone about a 1.5 weeks ago to the graduation of a surprise kid of the dad's, or something like that...Anyway, it's been the best week and a half of the year. He came back today.

This afternoon was Field Day. I don't really like Field Day, and it was pouring when I got up, so I was not excited. But by the afternoon, the rain had stopped (even though it was still cool out). The directions given to me by the pe teacher, who runs Field Day, was to divide my class into two groups. So I did. Pretty much, I divided them according to whose class they were going into next year. They didn't know that, though.

I sort of accompanied one group of my class during the whole Field Day. The other group seemed to have the other two 5th grade teachers accompanying them, so I stayed with one group.

Things seemed to be going well. It wasn't raining, and kids were laughing. Everyone seemed to be having fun. Then I get with my group to the second to the last station. One of the recess gals comes over to me.

"Derrell and Fzeen are in the office. They drew punches and made contact," she said. Hmmm. Upon further questioning, it seems they fought each other. I was to send their things once we got back into the classroom.

I saw our principal out at the Field Day, so I went over to him. "Derrell and Fzeen are in the office for fighting," I told him. He said he had heard that they were in the office, but hadn't been told the specifics. "Well," I continued, "Tomorrow we are having a reward and watching a movie in the afternoon."

My principal said, "They definitely should not be able to go to a class reward. Send them to the office tomorrow."

Cool, I thought. That was what I had hoped he'd say.

Later, I get an email that Derrell and Fzeen are suspended from school tomorrow. SWEET! Only two more days to go.

Then Who Can You Trust?

2010-06-10T21:23:00.000-07:00

For the last reward of the year, the kids are going to earn a movie. Notice I say "going to..." They will watch a movie the afternoon of the day before the last day of school. Because really, what else is there to do?

So the other day they had earned their reward, "kickball challenge," when they got to challenge another 5th grade class to a game of kickball at the end of the day. We had previously been challenged to kickball by Mrs. Smith's class, and we won, and the kids really enjoyed it. So this time we challenged Mrs. Johnson's class. We had beat Smith's class, and Johnson's class had previously beaten Smith's class. Therefore, if we won, we'd be the champs of 5th grade. And we won!

On to a new challenge. As previously stated, it was for a movie. I will show it regardless of behavior. But the kids don't know that. On Tuesday, I put up five blanks on the board. Yesterday they were so bad that I didn't give them any letters. But today they worked and worked and worked. So at the end of the day, I commended them on their behavior, and gave them an "M." I had planned on giving them a letter a day, beginning with m, and just spelling out "movie." No games or tricks like I usually do to keep them guessing.

Today they got an "m." It's a 5-letter word beginning with "m." It's obvious what it is going to spell. But I have set a precedence here. As soon as I put up an "m," some kids said, "It spells movie!" But other kids just didn't think they could trust me. Would I really make it that easy-that obvious? No, they decided. And I heard several kids say, "I don't think it spells it movie...You know how she likes to put up the wrong letters!"

You can't trust the teacher.

Tough Day (Only 7 More To Go)

2010-06-09T18:50:00.000-07:00

I'm totally exhausted. Just yesterday I was gloating about what a great job I did of planning activities for these last few weeks of school. The kids have been working for the past three weeks on a large Revolutionary War research project, and on last Monday I gave them the assignment of creating an "ABC Book of 5th Grade Memories." So we have just been going from one project to another, with assessments thrown in between. Things were going well.

Today was a totally different story. Was it just yesterday that I was bragging about how good I was? It all started, really, when I woke at 3 am to go to the bathroom. I could feel the beginnings of a bad headache coming on. But when I awoke at 6 am to start my day, I didn't take any Aleve. Therefore, I even started my day with a raging headache.

Then, today was the day that kids who were having to go to a new school next year due to boundary changes were going to be visiting their new place. And our IP teacher was going to go with them. Yesterday she had sent a message saying no IP services, and I always then wonder what I'll do with Adam all day long. But hey, he's on good meds now, so I figured it would be ok. But in the morning when I went to get my class, I could tell Adam did not take his meds that morning. So as we walked into the building, I asked him if he had taken his meds. No, he told me (no surprise). I then asked his 6th grade sister, who for some reason has the responsibility of seeing that Adam gets his meds. She wasn't sure. But I knew.

Normally when this happens, he goes to IP (Resource Room) as normal, and the IP teacher just keeps him until about 11 am, when the nurse gives him his meds a bit early. I don't have to deal with him. Unfortunately, remember, today the IP teacher was gone. I had no place to send Adam except the office. I did keep him as long as I could stand it, but when he is yelling, burping, out of his chair, etc., etc., showing behaviors I would not put up with from anyone else, I had to do something. I sent Adam with some work to the office, and followed it up with an email to our principal, ccing the nurse and our Educational Assisstant. In my email I said I was trying to give a health CBA, and Adam was making all kinds of inappropriate noises and being just way too distractive in the room.

I get this email back from our EA-whom I like, although her email today ticked me off. She said in the email that when Adam doesn't get his meds, he just has no control over his emotions, and how frustating that must be for him...Yes, I replied, but I am trying to get 25 other students to complete the health CBA, and it wasn't working for him to be in the classroom. She replied, asking if Adam could wait until the afternoon to take the CBA, after taking his meds. I replied that would be fine, although it wouldn't make any difference. That seemed to really put her off, as she replied, "What do you mean by'it won't make any difference'?"

Now, I have no idea how she can NOT know what I mean. Adam is not capable of doing 5th grade work, no matter how medicated he is! She knows this! But I made some sort of comment that I knew the CBA would be difficult for Adam no matter what, and perhaps he could do it if he just dictated it to someone. What an excellent idea, she said. I should tell IP that tomorrow.

And won't IP be happy about that one. You know, no matter how well-meaning people are, when they aren't in the classroom every day all day long, they have no idea, or forget, how tough teaching really is.

It Was Meant To Be A Threat!

2010-05-28T19:00:00.001-07:00

Today we had an assembly for the Battle of the Books. One of the teams from my class was representing the whole 5th grade, so I was pretty proud. It was in the morning. We went first thing, got the kids settled on the floor in straight lines, and then I sat in an uncomfortable folding chair off to the side of my class where I could cast glaring looks at unruly children.

The assembly was about to begin, and I had my eye on Adam. He had something in his hands that looked like Silly Putty, but frankly, I didn't care much as it kept him fairly quiet and his hands busy. However, he was having a pretty good time showing it to kids around him. So I got his attention.

I gave him one of those teacher looks. "Adam," I said. And I pointed to a spot right next to me at my feet. "Do you want to sit here?"

Now, I fully expected him to say, "No." Then, I was going to follow that up with a comment like, "Then turn around and be quiet!"

But Adam did not follow this script. He looked at the spot I pointed to at my feet, looked at me, gave me a smile and said, "Sure!" He got up and came over and sat down at my feet. He was my buddy for the whole assembly.

It was supposed to be a threat.

TMI

2010-05-26T20:27:00.001-07:00

This is an email I got today from a parent of mine who volunteers in my room every Friday afternoon:

Well I won’t be there this Friday I have a Dr. appt. at 1:50. I got really sick Sunday(stomach) and couldn’t move and did not go to work Mon. I bloated up gassy and a whole lot of pain in my right side of my stomach. I either have to get my gull bladder out or hysterectomy or I don’t know. They did test on me and I will get the results Friday.

"Bloated up gassy?" Can we say, "Too Much Information?"

Tears in the Afternoon

2010-05-24T04:50:00.001-07:00

As indicated in my last post, Carl was in tears twice on Friday. Here's the incident that escalated into tears in the afternoon:

Carl was absent on Thursday. I had handed out a Revolutionary War research project that was meant to keep my fifth graders busy until the last day of school. The students don't need to know that I have to get my final grades in long before the project is due...Don't tell.

Anyway, Friday morning as kids came into the room and got settled, I see Carl with his nose in a book. The Revolutionary War Project packet is sitting, untouched, in front of him. "Carl," I said, "On your desk is a Revolutionary War Research Project that I handed out yesterday. Read through it, and if you have questions, ask Ramon." Then I got busy, and promptly forgot all about Carl and the research project.

That afternoon, for the last 1.5 hours of the day, I gave the class time to work on their research project. The packet consists of three sections: Maps and Pictures, Written Work, and Creative Use of the Imagination. Depending on what final score the kids are going for, they must complete a certain amount of activities from each of the three sections. The most activities they have to complete would be nine total activities from the packet. There are about six activities to choose from in each section. It's really a straight forward packet, with each activity explained.

But Carl brings the packet up to me. "I don't get it," he says. I'm thinking that is a pretty generalized statement...what exactly doesn't he get? The directions are clear. The rules clearly state how many activities he needs complete for different grades. The activities are clearly written in English...What on earth doesn't he "get?" Plus, after his little rhombus problem from the morning, I'm not feeling very patient with Mr. Carl at that point.

"I just don't get it. The whole thing," Carl said, his eyes filling up with tears. I take a deep breath and try to remain calm. "Carl," I said. "Is there a specific thing with the directions you are having trouble understanding?"

"I just don't get it," he replied...Grrr....He is taxing my patience. I was trying so hard to remain calm. Carl does have attention deficit disorder (not hyper, too, thank goodness), so I try to cut him some slack. "What's a T-chart?" he asks. Now, yes, on Thursday when I handed out the packet, that was one of the many activities that we discussed, as I didn't think they'd understand a T-chart (I should probably change that activity...note to self). So I explained that particular activity to Carl, who then asked me what was the French and Indian War?

"Carl, that is what you are supposed to find out. That is why it is called research. We have books in the room. We have library books, social studies books, and three sets of encyclopedias to use for research."

"What's an encyclopedia?" Carl asks. He really isn't stupid. I just am not sure what his problem is, but my patience is running out. "Carl," I said. "I think you are getting overwhelmed with this assignment. Take this packet home tonight and show it to your mom. She will help you get organized and make a plan of activities to complete. For now, choose just one activity to work on here in class."

About five minutes later he comes up to me. "What is a musket," he asks. Now, I KNOW that there are at least two activities that involve finding out what a musket is. Carl, it appears, wants me to tell him. "Carl, did you even try looking in a book?"

I tell you, I was done with Carl. Perhaps he should be homeschooled, then he'd get the one-on-one he craves. But in my class of 26, I don't have time to hold Carl's hand. I sent his mom an email. Let her figure it out. She created this ultra-dependant boy. But I told his mom in the email that 6th grade is all about research projects, so he'd better figure it out.

Countdown Has Begun

2010-05-23T09:42:00.000-07:00

There are 19 days left of school, and I shall be happy to send a few kids away!

*Carl is the youngest of two or three kids in his family, and he is babied. A few weeks ago he threw a crying fit in the hallway, because he forgot to grab his practice record sheet when he left for band. He came back to the class to get it, but I wasn't there and had locked the door. I had the audacity to actually use my planning time to run off work instead of waiting in my classroom in case any student needed me...When Carl was unsuccessful at convincing any other teacher to let him into the room to get what he needed, he apparently had an emotional breakdown in the hallway, dissolving into tears. C'mon, buddy-you are almost a 6th grader! And you are crying over this? It's May, and I think that by now grabbing your practice sheet should be automatic. You screwed up. Deal with it.

Then on Friday he actually threw two crying/sulking fits. The first one happened in the morning. I handed back geometry tests, and Carl did poorly, getting less than 70%. One of the questions he missed was one where he was to simply draw a rhombus with no right angles. He correctly drew the shape, as he found the shape on his math template and traced it. That was acceptable. But then he added measurements to the sides of the shape. He made one set of parallel sides measure 1 foot. He made the other set of parallel sides measure 2 feet. Therefore, it was no longer a rhombus. A rhombus has four equal sides. I checked the problem wrong, indicating that his shape was correct, but that the measurements he added then made his answer incorrect. He brought his test up to me.

"Why is this wrong?" he asked. I pointed out exactly what I had already explained on his paper. "But you said my shape is right," he continued to argue.

"Yes," I replied. "But the measurements you included are not correct for a rhombus. A rhombus has 4 equal sides. Your measurements show you inteded the sides to not be equal. It shows me that you do not understand what a rhombus is."

"But I didn't have to put measurements. That was doing extra!" he said. He wanted to be rewarded for that, apparently.

"Sorry. You shouldn't have added the measurements. They are wrong for a rhombus. Your answer is wrong."

"I can erase the measurements," Carl persisted.

"No. The test is over. I have corrected it. Your answer was wrong. You cannot change your answer," I said.

So Carl, who sits in the front row, pouted and scowled at me all morning long. Then it was lunchtime. I took them to lunch, but then called Carl outside. He reluctantly came out.

"Carl, you are on ASB. What is your position?" I asked.

"I'm the treasurer," he replied.

"And are you planning on running for ASB next year?" I inquired further, thinking please, oh please say yes...

"Yes," he answered. SCORE!

"Well," I said, "You need to get a recommendation from your teacher, or have you forgotten? I'll tell you one thing, an ASB officer must be responsible, reliable, and have a great attitude. Not someone who argues with the teacher, and then pouts, scowls, and cries when he doesn't get what he wants. Think about that." I walked away.

And you know what? I will not recommend him. He's babied by his mother, and the teacher he had for the last two years before me babied him. He needs to grow up.

Favorite Holiday

2010-05-09T19:26:00.000-07:00

My Mother's Day stunk.

More Funny Things Kids Write

2010-04-30T21:33:00.000-07:00

*Apology note written to me from a boy student who was caught misbehaving and causing a disruption in class:

"Dear Teacher,
I am sorry I did wut I wasn't supposed to do I will not do it again."

I wonder if he even knows WHY he got into trouble...A very vague apology note!

*And Adam wrote me a persuasive letter about where the class should go on a field trip this year:

"Dear Teacher,
we shoed go to the pacific science sinner beause you can learn now stuff like learning about the hymen body and about the hymen brain..."

Now, I think Adam is correct. The Pacific Science Sinner seems like just the place for learning all about the hymen...

Times They Are A'Changin'

2010-03-30T18:01:00.000-07:00

It used to be that we could threaten our students with, "If you don't study hard and go to college, you might end up being a garbage collector!" But garbage men may go on strike. And on a news brief I heard that garbage collectors make $100,000.00. Hardly a threat any more. About $30,000.00 more than I make? With my college degrees and 17 years of teaching experience? Maybe I went into the wrong profession.

Irony

2010-03-10T06:10:00.000-08:00

This is true irony: My house is terribly cluttered, so I'm continually buying magazines about how to control the clutter. I have so many magazines that it is cluttering up my house.

Spelling Lesson

2010-03-04T22:13:00.000-08:00

I've had a couple glasses of wine, so I'm feeling a bit blue right now that no one reads my blog...I try to make it entertaining...

There is something I do in class for "all class" rewards. It's a pretty fun idea-I sort of made it up last year when I was desparately searching for somthing that might work on my mean class to make them behave. It didn't make a difference on my mean class. They stayed mean.

This year my class, for the most part, is nice. I'm using the same all class reward that I developed last year, and it is working like a charm. I was inspired by Hang Man and Vanna White. What I do is I decide ahead of time what the reward will be (free movie afternoon, for example), and on the board up front in the class I put blanks for letters, leaving spaces between words. When the whole class behaves (which is quite often with this group), they earn a letter. As I put up letters, the kids have fun trying to guess what the reward is. I have fun with it, too. Sometimes I put up a random letter, and this really throws them. Then later I say to the class, "What was I thinking? There is no Z in that word..." And I change it to the correct letter. I love it.

So today the kids earned their last letter for this reward. The reward was "Books and Brownies Afternoon." They were very excited. I milked it as long as I could. I was late picking them up from PE, but they had come out of the building and were lined up in a straight line, just waiting for me. And walking back? It was the straightest, quietest line they have done yet. I saw a guy that comes out to be our tech problem solver, and I joked with him that they were working hard to earn this reward. The cool thing is that the reward is really just an afternoon of reading, but they are as excited as if it was a field trip!

So we get back into the room from pe, and the kids have to finish their writing assessments. They have only one remaining letter to earn. It's quiet, and remained so, until about 3:15. I say to them in a serious voice, "I just realized I made a huge mistake. You can not tell the principal I did this; do not tell your parents."

They stare at me with huge eyes and open mouths as they ponder exactly what mistake I could have made...I continue to tell them that as their teacher, I am their role model. And I should be modeling the right way to act, to treat others, and how to live a healthy lifestyle. I said, "I didn't mean to write 'brownies' up on the board. I meant to write 'Books and BROCOLLI afternoon!" I played it up so well. I'm sure some of the kids believed that I really had made this grave error.

Why the Rich Get Richer, and the Poor Get Poorer

2010-02-07T21:10:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I went to a rally in support of our school district's two levies which are currently on the ballot. We met downtown in front of one of the middle schools. It was a deja vu experience, since we had a few rallies there back in September during the strike. I might add that the turnout was better for the strike, as well as the enthusiasm of supporting horn honks from cars during the strike...This levy rally was poorly attended. I hope it isn't an indication of a bad voting result...

Anyway, while I was holding a sign and waving to cars, a former student of mine came over. I had her as a 6th grader three years ago. I really liked her, and it was great seeing her. She is now a ninth grader at one of the high schools, and is on the basketball team. As luck would have it, she was selling coupon books for $10.00. And so yes, I dug through my purse to find enough cash, and bought one.

Then I said to her, "See that well-dressed man over there? He is our school district's Superintendant, and he makes about $240,000.00 a year. More than our vice-president of the United States. Go ask him to buy a coupon book or two."

So she headed off to hit him up. I remember that she was never shy...He didn't buy one, though, as he said he didn't have any cash on him, but that she should email his office on Monday.

Then I also told her, "See that short man over there with the tan? A nice tan for February...He is a member of our school board. He owns a restaurant in town. He has money, too. Go ask him to buy a coupon book."

She did, but I'm not sure if he bought one or not. I just thought it was interesting that the poor teacher digs through her purse to gather $10, but two people to whom money is no object could not even buy one $10 coupon book from a student in a district they represent. The rich get richer, and the poor get poorer.

The Joys of Teaching

2010-02-05T18:30:00.000-08:00

My kids this year are just so danged cute! Here are some stories:

*I had had the kids in literature groups of 3 or 4 reading various books by Bill Wallace. Since I want the kids to do an author study involving reading a second book by the same author, I was going to have the kids choose their second book. I knew that at least one student in the room has read each book there was to choose from, so I decided to let the kids do the "book talks." However, they weren't to reveal plot, since that is like going to the movies and having the person behind you reveal the ending. All the kids were to do was to say if it was a good book, if they'd recommend it, if it was funny, sad, etc.

Anyway, Eduard raises his hand to do the book talk for one of the books. He begins by saying he really liked the book. Then he says, "The main character, Tom, goes..." I stopped him, and reminded him that he wasn't supposed to reveal the plot. So he says, "This guy goes..."

I said, "You mean Tom?"

"Yeah," Eduard replied, and continued to tell us what the book was about. I guess since he wasn't using the main character's name anymore, we wouldn't know what was happening.

*Today my kids were coming back from music choice. They come back from three different places: band, orchestra, and general music. I meet them outside like I do at recess, and when they are all lined up, we go into the classroom. I went outside, and some kids came over. Anas was in front, and said to me, "Let's just forget about the others and go in."

"I can't do that," I replied, "because in my classroom there is no child left behind!"

He didn't get it, but I laughed inside...But then he points to this button I bought last summer at the NEA convention in San Diego. It is bright red and says, "No teacher left behind!" I wear it on my lanyard.

He said, "Hey! Your button says No Teacher Left Behind!"

"Really!" I asked, very surprised..."Wow! I didn't know that!"

Anas turned to the kid behind him, and informed him that I was wearing a button that said something and I didn't even know I was wearing it! Then he turned back to me and said, "Did you really not know you were wearing it?"

"I had no idea," I said. Then I said, "Anas, now do you really think I didn't know I was wearing this button?"

He paused, and said, "Maybe..."

"Anas, I know I'm wearing this button. I bought it." He thought for a minute. "Oh, were you being sarcastic?"

"Maybe a little bit, Anas..." I said.

And in my mind I'm hearing Charlie Brown yelling, "Don't you know sarcasm when you hear it??"

Not Your Average Written Reports

2010-01-18T15:56:00.000-08:00

I've spent most of this 3-day weekend grading 5th grade explorer projects. Along with a variety of activities each student had to do on their assigned explorer was to write a report. Here are some great lines:

"Samuel de Champlain was trying to go to Canada to trade fur. He jacked off and made his crew work on the fur trading..."

"Hudson and his crew sailed to Greenland. They did not find what they were looking for. They found gold and gems but they really wanted to find spices. Hudson really wanted to find the spices to help mankind. Hudson was really sad because he wanted people to keep their food fresh..."

Champlain must have run some kind of crew, huh? And Hudson? Didn't he go on to discover Tupperware?

A Tall Order

2009-12-23T19:00:00.000-08:00

Last Friday I wasn't feeling well. My throat hurt. But it was the last Friday before winter break, and we had a holiday breakfast at school that morning, so I went. As the day wore on, my stomach began to hurt.

After the kids came back in from lunch recess, I wondered if I was going to make it through the rest of the day without puking. I made it through the 35 minutes until it was time to go to the library.

While at the library, I just sat at a table. Our Instructional Coach came out of her office, and asked me if I was ok. I said I felt pretty bad. Thinking about our afternoon, I realized that at 2:08 my kids went to music for 45 minutes, and then most of the kids would be helping to set up for the band and orchestra concert at 3 pm. Really, after 2:08, there wasn't much to do. I only needed class coverage for the dismissal time at the end of the day.

So I asked our coach what she was doing at 3:30. She said she could cover my class so that I could just go home at 2:08. Thank goodness.

When library was over, we returned to class. The first thing I did was to tell my students that I just felt really sick to my stomach, and that once they went to music, I was going to go home.

Leo then said, with anguish in his voice, "But who will take care of us?"

Isn't that sweet? "...take care of us..." was the way he put it. Not who will be our sub, or who will excuse us to go home, or who will teach us...But who will take care of us. That shows their idea of me-not just a teacher. I take care of them. Pretty tall order, I'd say. I'll do my best.

The Real Reason for the Season

2009-12-22T07:05:00.000-08:00

I have an advent "tree" that I put out every year. It is a wooden, free-standing tree on a base with 24 drawers. I put a little decoration into each drawer. Each day, then, the kids get to open a numbered drawer and take out a decoration, and hang it on the tree. Behind drawer 24 is the wooden star for the top. That means Santa comes that night when the star goes up! I got this tree when Emily was 2 yrs old, so that means I've used it every year now for 12 years.

The decorations are all cute and all different. Of course, one is baby Jesus, and babies are cute, so it's fun for the kids to get him. Not being very religious, though, makes it less of a big deal. I usually say something tongue in cheek about the "reason for the season."

So today, Emily got the Santa decoration. I happen to like that cute little Santa, and laughed, saying that Santa was the "real" reason for the season.

Stella then said, "No-the reason for the season is that the earth is tilted on it's axis..."

She's got a point. No argument there.

Love That Technology!

2009-12-19T09:51:00.000-08:00

My fifth graders are currently in the midst of a fairly large unit on explorers. They each have been assigned an explorer to research, and have a variety of activities to complete. The last activity they had to do was to create a "Help Wanted" poster that their explorer might have put up to get men to go on his expedition. It was to be a persuasive poster.

The other day I decided it was time to explain about the poster. I talked about the purpose of this poster, and together we brainstormed information that should go on the poster. I then told the students that they were to complete a rough draft sketch of their poster on notebook paper before doing the real poster on the nicer, larger paper I had available.

The kids got right to work. About five minutes later I had some kids showing me their poorly-designed rough sketch. They obviously didn't know what a "Help Wanted" poster should look like, I thought. They need to see some examples, I thought further. So I stopped the class.

"I think you all need to see some examples of help wanted posters," I told them. I turned on the document camera so that I could show some examples up large on the Smart Board for all to see. Then I went to Google and typed in "Help Wanted Posters." A list of links came up.

I clicked on the first link, which was for an all-posters websight. It brought me to a page with thumbnail examples of a variety of posters. I was focused; looking for the words "Help Wanted" at the top of thumbnails. Suddenly, I heard a commotion in the room, and some whispering.

I focused in, then, on one of the thumbnail posters. I had noticed it, and thought it was a poster showing stick figures in wrestling moves. But it wasn't wrestling moves. It was sex positions. It was like the Kama Sutra for stick figures.

Now, in our district, we have a filter system. I cannot even show Utube videos. And many times when I've been searchiing for websites, I get a screen that forbids me from opening a particular site. But it didn't catch this one. And unfortunately, a few of the kids did catch it. And knew what it was about (my sweet little kids?).

I closed out the windows as fast as I could, and then just sat there stunned. It was time to excuse them for music, and not knowing what else to do, I excused them. I know that not everyone saw-most kids did not, like me, focus in on it. But a few did. I saw Leo go over to some other boys, whispering, "Did you see that?"

But I did go to both our Curriculum Coach and to our Principal to let them know what had happened, just in case. The verdict was: we have a good filter system but it doesn't catch everything. My principal said if the kids came back from music still talking about it, that I should just explain what happened. Luckily, it seemed like they weren't talking about it anymore.

The next day I was talking with one of the teachers, and told him what had happened. He showed me how I can push a button on my remote that will freeze whatever is on the screen, and can then continue to search for posters (or whatever) without it showing on the screen until I want it to.

But it would have been just my luck to have "frozen" the screen right when the Kama Sutra stick figures were there.

Grammar Problem

2009-12-11T13:51:00.000-08:00

I received this email from the National Education Association, and one of the very first sentences bothered me-not that anyone seems to actually read my blog and could agree or disagree with me, but there you have it. It bothers me, and I must put it in writing.

Here's the paragraph: "As we reported last week, Congress is considering a second economic recovery package, focused on job creation. A bill could be taken up in the House of Representatives as early as next week. Critical to such a package is the inclusion of an Education Jobs Fund to help save and create jobs that help students achieve, run our schools, and strengthen the middle class."

Read that last sentence in that paragraph. The way that sentence is written, it sounds as if this bill will help students "achieve, run our schools, and strengthem the middle class."

Wow. Can students really do all that? And do I want them to? Do I want to work in a school run by students? Are they really going to be capable of strengthening the middle class?

See what I mean? I think someone should have proofread more carefully.

Proud Momma

2009-12-05T09:32:00.000-08:00

The other day my older daughter came home, and told me that she had taken a survey in her honor's social studies class. It was a political survey, and her answers scored points that placed her into a political party that most fit her ideals. I'm so very proud to say that my daughter is a Liberal Democrat!

Later, both of my girls were watching "Fiddler on the Roof" On Demand. The part came where the one daughter marries the Catholic, and her father claims she is dead to him. This bothered my girls, and they wondered aloud if we'd ever do that if they were to marry out of our faith. My husband said, "It would be more like if you married into a faith..."

Haha. Then my daughters thought. And they said, "No, it would be more like if we married a Republican!"

You got that right, girls! But they'd never do that.

Ready, Set, GO!

2009-11-13T06:25:00.000-08:00

I was reminded of this story the other day while I was struggling to score my fifth graders' writing assessments. One girl wrote a very good story-she's a good little writer! Her story reminded me of something that happened to me once, and I shared it yesterday with my class. It's one of my favorite stories.

I was 15 and learning to drive. I don't remember Dad taking me out to drive too frequently; most of my driving happened during Driver's Ed. Dad made me nervous, and he wasn't the most patient of instructors when it came to his daughters and his car.

But on this day, he decided to let me drive to the town of Snohomish. To get there from our house, you crossed 132nd, and drove down a windy, steep hill into the Snohomish Flats. You then drove through the Flats to a stop light. Now, it is a major intersection, but in those days, it was a stop for cars going in my direction, but not a stop for the cars going on the highway. Therefore, I had to stop and watch for the break in traffic to cross the highway and continue on into Snohimish. The traffic on the highway traveled at high speeds, too, so it really was a dangerous spot.

We got to the light and stopped. I was watching traffic to my left and right, waiting for a break. So was Dad. In fact, as he saw a break in the traffic coming up, he said, "Ok. Get ready...get set...GO!"

I stomped on the gas pedal. My tires squealed and spun as I sped out of there. Dad clung to the seat. I'm sure he uttered some curse words as he yelled at me, "What do you think you're doing?"

I just smiled sweetly. "Dad," I said. "When you said ready, set, go, I assumed it was a race, and I wanted to win!"

I don't recall getting into trouble. I don't believe I did. Maybe at 15 I was able to score a point. But I never liked driving anywhere with Dad in the car.

Egg On My Face (And The Floor)

2009-11-10T16:01:00.000-08:00

I wrote this story the other day in my class when I was having my students write about something that happened to them that they were reminded of when they thought of a particular place. I used my trip I took to Japan and Okinawa as an example, because many things happened on that trip. This is one of them:

"My flight had just arrived to Okinawa, and I got off the plane. The airplane I had ridden in to Japan was the largest plane I had ever been in-I remember wondering if it would even be able to get off the ground! Luckily it did, and after a 15 hour flight, I arrived in Okinawa. I had sat for so long that my feet felt like lead, but they still worked, so I got off the plane and went through customs. When I left customs, Colonel Graham, a long-time friend of my dad’s, was waiting for me on the other side of the gate. He took my picture as I came through the gate so that I could always remember my first few steps onto Japanese soil. I felt like a celebrity!
Our first task was to go to eat dinner somewhere. After a 15 hour flight, I was starved! I had wondered what kind of food was in store for me. We went to a small, local restaurant for dinner. Even though I certainly couldn’t read the menu with the Japanese characters, the menu had a picture of each dish offered, so I ordered what looked delicious to me. That happened to be a bowl of sukiyaki, which is a dish with meat and vegetables in a broth served in a bowl. It looked wonderful, and my stomach growled as my mouth watered just thinking about it.
After a bit of waiting, my food arrived. The waitress set my food down in front of me. Interestingly enough, there was this complete egg on the plate next to my bowl of sukiyaki. I asked Colonel Graham why an egg came with my dinner. He explained to me that it was the traditional Okinawan way to eat your food. The idea was to crack the raw egg, and let it sit on top of your hot food. The heat from the food would cook the egg, and then you could mix the cooked egg into your meal. He sort of discouraged me from trying it, as you can get sick from a raw egg. But, this trip was all about new experiences for me, so I decided to try the raw egg.
I picked up the egg, and lightly tapped it against my bowl. Nothing happened. I took the egg, and tapped it against my bowl again. Still, nothing happened. I tapped it a bit harder against the bowl. It still would not break. The chickens in Okinawa lay strong eggs, I thought.
This time I took the egg and hit it really hard against the edge of my sukiyaki bowl. I was not shy this time, or timid. I hit it hard. I wanted that thing to crack so that I could enjoy my meal. I was so hungry, and this egg was making me wait even longer to eat my meal that smelled so heavenly in front of me.
This time I was successful. The egg did break. But it’s funny about eggs-you can’t really control where they go. The shell broke, and the slimy egg slid out and ran out of the egg, and down the outside of the bowl. It continued to slide, letting gravity pull it downward. It was almost alive with the goal of getting away from my food. It slid down the side of the bowl and onto the table top. Still it continued to travel downward. It slid to the edge of the table, and down it went. Right onto the floor in a slimy, glumpy, shimmering mess.
I sat there in a stunned silence. Then I became so embarrassed as I realized what had happened. Colonel Graham began to laugh and laugh, which really made me feel even more embarrassed! I did wish I could just slide down and stay under that table, just like my egg. But I couldn’t. I realized just then that no one else in the whole restaurant was looking at me. Even the waitress did not rush over to clean up the mess, like they would in America. It dawned on me that this was a culture that doesn’t want anyone to be embarrassed. This was a culture that believed in showing respect to others. If the waitress had rushed over to clean up my egg, I would have had to apologize for my clumsiness, and my embarrassment would have increased. But since no one looked at me, I could almost pretend it didn’t happen."

This story is only lacking in a concluding sentence. Let's just say that when we got back to Col. Graham's house, and we related the story to his wife, who translated it to her Japanese mother, the idea of not laughing at someone to cause them embarrassment completely flew out the window. Yoshiko's mom laughed the hardest! So much for saving face!

The Winning Entry

2009-10-25T09:13:00.000-07:00

The local newspaper is having a contest. They want you to write your favorite Christmas memory, and the Grand Prize winner wins 4 tickets to see the Radio City Christmas Spectacular featuring the Rockettes, and they get a meet and greet session with the Rockettes. Then, five winning essays will each win four free tickets. I'm sure I'll win. This is my essay I wrote:

"I have many wonderful memories of Christmases past, from walking in the snowy woods in search of the perfect Christmas tree to baking cookies for Santa. But one memory stands out the most for me…

Our Christmas tradition when I was little was to spend Christmas Day at my aunt and uncle’s house in Seattle. My grandmother, who lived right next door, would also make the drive from Everett to Seattle with us. We’d all pile into the small, two-door car on Christmas Day. My sisters and my grandmother would sit in the back. My parents would sit in the front. And me? I’d sit on my mom’s lap. Apparently, we didn’t worry about seatbelts in the late 1960s…

On this particular Christmas, we piled into the car for our annual trek into Seattle. I had just gotten into the car and sat down on mom’s lap. That is when it happened.

Even though I was on mom’s lap, I still had to swing my legs into the car. I was in the process of doing this, when mom called out, “Ok, is everyone in?” Before I could answer, she slammed the car door shut. And it slammed shut right onto my big toe!

I am sure that I immediately cried out, and that she quickly opened the door, but the damage had been done. I am sure that my dad drove like a maniac to my aunt and uncle’s house in Seattle. My dad then took me to the Emergency Room at a nearby hospital. This was an embarrassing event for me as well, since I had to take off my tights in front of my dad, the doctor, and a cousin I didn’t really know who came along with us to show us the way to the hospital. This was humiliating for such a shy seven-year old, and was like rubbing salt into the wound.

However, the toe wasn’t broken. We went back to my aunt and uncle’s house. I remember just sitting that year and wearing slippers. That night, my toe hurt me too much to sleep. I got up and went out into the family room where my dad was watching an old movie on tv. I crawled into his lap and snuggled in. I felt better.

But this is not a happy memory. So why should it win? Because I know that my mom felt just terrible for having caused her baby such pain, and on Christmas of all days. A day that should be full of happy surprises for her children instead was a day of pain. And I know she has carried that guilt now for 40 years. If this story wins the contest, I will be sure to take her to see the Radio City Christmas Spectacular, because I believe this is the only way that she can finally let go of that guilt and be at peace.

And Christmas should be all about peace, don’t you think?"

The hardest part for me was keeping the essay to 500 words or less. My original one was almost 600 words. The one I entered is 496. I hope I win!

A Success Story

2009-10-24T07:52:00.000-07:00

Last Wednesday morning I was at school checking email, the first thing I usually do when I get into my classroom. As I was reading an email, I received another one. I clicked it open, and read the email. It was from the mom of one of my boys, and she was really angry with me. In fact, I don't think I've ever had a parent so mad at me, and it has happened from time to time over these last 20-plus years of teaching. It doesn't happen as much lately, though, as it used to when I was young and inexperienced.

Anyway, she was livid. Livid is a good word choice here. Here is the edited email:

"Hi I am Bobby’s mother.

I would really love to speak with you about Bobby and how you handle situations with a child that has a disability which is ADHD. I have several concerns, I am extremely upset with the fact that he comes home daily upset about what happens in the classroom as far as him being sent out and then getting a 1 in science because he was not in the class to participate I feel is ridiculous and to me as an educator I would really love to know what “education” you have when dealing with “non-cookie cutter children”. I will not have his self esteem damaged by a teacher who is not capable or patient enough to deal with these types of children. He does have an IEP which is being put in place currently so if need be I can handle this in a variety of ways which will include by passing you and (the school) and going straight to the school district, I have a great lawyers name as well. I have gone through this with my oldest son and (this school) so I am done playing games with people here!!!! I really hope you can provide me some answers as to how we are going to make sure Bobby has a good school year with out crying daily when he gets home because of his classroom situation."

Well, I sat there stunned. Where to begin, where to begin? I knew I should reply as soon as possible, but if this turned ugly, I also wanted my beloved principal to know of the situation. So I forwarded the email to her, along with the background of the situation that had occured the day before with Bobby during science: Students were in small groups of three working on a hands-on science activity where they were to build a "pendulum." At one point, for some reason, Bobby was back at the sink with a boy from another group, and they were happily punching each other many times in the arm. I separated them-one at a study carol in the class, and the other, Bobby, into the hall at a table. There aren't many places to send a kid to cool off. By the time both returned to the class, science was over. Too bad, they missed the fun activity. Punishment enough, I thought, and case closed.

But not closed, apparently...I waited for my principal's response, as I wanted to get a reply off to this mom as soon as possible. Then it was recess, so I wandered over to my principal's office, and peeked in. "Did you see the email from Bobby's mom?" I inquired.

"You mean the one where she's going to sue you?" my principal asked.

"That would be the one," I replied. My principal said that yes, she saw it, and would respond to it-I didn't have to. But, I told her I felt I should be the one to respond, as I was the one who had the information that the mom obviously didn't have about that science lesson. I also told my principal that I was certain I could get the mom's anger deflated enough to be productive. I would, I said, respond not only as a teacher, but as a parent. That always works, I've found.

So I did respond. I sent the email (cc'd to my principal). I thanked her for her email, and said I wanted to give her some details about the situation that she probably didn't hear from her son. I told her then about the arm punching. I explained the whole scenario. I explained further that his belief about getting a bad grade was the result of a speech I gave to the whole class about group participation being just as big of a part of their grade as any test. Bobby apparently realized his participation that day was not good.

I also said that Bobby is a very sensitive and kind boy, and I knew this was an unusual event so I didn't pursue it much further. I went on to say there were some behaviors that I wanted Bobby to work on, and since he responded so well to positives, I wanted to come up with some sort of chart where when he did those positive things, I'd give him a sticker or stamp. At then end of the week, he could take the chart home, and she could give him positive feedback too. I invited her to come in to meet with me to organize this.

Her reply came quickly, and I could tell immediately that the anger was gone, although she still questioned whether my expectations for him were "appropriate and reasonable." I emailed back that I had been at his IEP meeting (which was scheduled at a time she requested, then she didn't even show up) and I thought my three expectations were fine, but that I was happy to run the idea by the IP teacher as well.

Her third reply had no anger or distrust in it at all. She'd be so happy to meet me, she said. In fact, we set up a meeting time for after school the next day. I knew the meeting would go well. In fact, when she showed up, she was putty in my hands immediately. She herself is very sensitive, and began crying at first, but then pulled herself together. She apologized for the email she sent. And it was a productive meeting. I think she just wanted to see that I was a good person.

The next day, Friday, Bobby came to school with a sack full of stickers, paper, pencils, etc., that she had bought for me at her new favorite store: The Dollar Store. Before I could send her an email to thank her, this is the email she sent me:

"Did Bobby give you the stickers and the paper if you just wanted to throw them on the paper and call it good that can work. You can use those for other’s too and when you run out let me know and I will go get more for you or if you think of anything let me know and I will go pick it up, don’t buy anything I will buy it!!!! I am really glad to have met you and appreciate your time thank you for caring about my son!!! He seemed allot better about everything last night too so it was a good thing I came and we got to meet…….I thought you were going to have warts and a broom LOL just kidding you are a very great teacher and I have SO MUCH RESPECT for your role in my child’s life"

Now, that's what I call a Success Story!

It All Makes Sense Now!

2009-10-10T09:22:00.000-07:00

Yesterday our preschool teacher shared that she had sent a parent letter home the other day, and thought she should mention all about the "fire drill" we had that turned into a marriage proposal. This teacher said she got two emails back from parents, one just saying what a sweet story it was.

The other parent thanked the teacher for the explanation about the fire drill. She said her daughter had come home and told her that they had had a fire drill that day, and that the firemen came, and one fireman kissed a girl...